Welp, here's part two, for all you interested parties.

I have this period, from 4pm to 6pm where I'm 'tutoring,' (and by 'tutoring' I mean spending 80 percent of that two hours twiddling my thumbs and waiting for tutees to show up) and I usually use this time to catch up on my feed on Steemit and, well, post poems out of my hyper-depressive blue book. I'm already on page 66, and I can feel myself sinking. Like, yay.

The last poem was about driving in the rain and missing a vitamin D dosage. I composed it in my head while turning a bend in the blue-lit rain and tried to remember it for the rest of my thirty-five minute drive to school so I could put it down in my notebook. I don't even remember if I wrote it down right away or not.

Anywho, this one has almost nothing to do with that one.

I think I took the motif 'Melting World' and ran the heck with it.

This deals with the night that followed the first 'Melting World,' and some dreams I had. Feelings, emotions, depression. It's all in this gulash. Just check it out.

Melting World (Part 2)

_{This is a close up of a character from Gustave Caillebotte’s Paris Street; Rainy Day (1877). There's a whole article analyzing his work here.}

my thumbs pressed into his throat,
the death in my brother's eyes,
i released.
his windpipe "was crushed" and then we
didn't talk about it anymore.

i found Sophia Hutchens and she was
as sick of me as you are, but then we
became friends again, shortly,
before i had to go to the farm.
Alexie gave water to a horse.

i was a creep.
a monster.

Marianne was terrified of me. didn't know who
i was.
i was a creep,
a monster.
the death in my boss' eyes,
the dogs mauled me in a minor key.
i cried "help."
my throat not working,
"they're attacking me."
"Caleb!"
"i'm being attacked!"
"Caleb!"
"they're attacking me!"
"Caleb!"
"Help!"

i woke to a perturbed brother.
a tap of strong water on a thick windowpane.
the black of the room pervaded my eyesight.
my heart beat in my throat.
terror.

i am a creep,
a monster.

the world outside melted into blue and dusk.

~

Yeah, I don't really remember who the 'you' was in that second stanza. I think it was my recently-exed ex, but I don't know. It could've been God, but I didn't capitalize it in my notebook. The effect is all the same, I guess.

Sorry if I bummed you out. Or worse, sorry if I bummed me out. None taken, but I totally bummed me out. :P

Anyways as always, you can comment or upvote if you feel like it. I love all of you anyways. God bless and goodnight. <3