Migrant's Ballad | Poetry

in writing •  7 years ago  (edited)

We crossed the dark skies

And Night's lofty Realm to come down here
-So we left our memories back there.
Down cold black streets we strayed to find a home
to light a fire in and try to reminisce.
But we only find lone corners, laughing thralls.
And all the faces we should know are blurred.

Loud trudging cars still tumbling down the road
that leads nowhere we'd ever cried.

Lifted, our eyes are weaning off the moon
as she releases that cruel spell that did once bind us
If you should ever -when you do- find that red vein
that would return us to our past dreams
-hospital aisles and wind-full nights,
raw letters written upon a raw wall
to teach my father, then a kid, the alphabet
with which he'd later teach me love and ruin, soft and flame,
and crumbling words to speak only of remainders-
if you should ever grant us blood, us carcass crawlers,
then please, do spare, do spare a rhyme
and a gentle thought for us, for me,
a burning name.

Once more, later, once more
we'll cross into the Night.
One day, one day, starry eyes.


Mist road.jpg

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Hello fellow steemians, how are you doing? I hope you're fine. I hope you've enjoyed the poem I posted up there. For me it's a bit of a complicated poem, it has a really odd rythm but I really like the images it brings up. I polished it as much as I could but it's a bit rebellious still :)
What did you think about it?
If you liked it, maybe you'd also like some of my other poems. Although I publish mostly in spanish there's also a short story in english called A dialogue in bed you might enjoy. If you liked it, please remember to upvote and re-steem.

Cheers, and have a nice day,

David.

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@ddatica, I like the way you have written this. I like the rawness of it. It fits with the topic. It's quite a task to write poetry in a language that is not your first or primary language. You have done a beautiful job with the rhythm and cadence of this poem. Your mastery of proper punctuation is commendable!

You have a couple of spelling errors which you might like to edit and correct:

windful

  • wind-full

alphabeth

  • alphabet

Thanks for being a member of my Discord Server. I'm following you now.

I've upvoted and resteemed this article as one of my daily post promotions for the @mitneb Curation Trail Project. It will be featured in the @mitneb Curation Trail Project Daily Report for 02 MAR 2018.

Cheers!

Hello @mitneb! Thanks for coming by! I'm really glad you like it. You have no idea. Along the years, I've felt english become more and more a language close to my soul -close enough that sometimes poems come out in this language. Thanks a lot for the corrections, and I hope I can keep bringing interesting materials to your attention.

Cheers, and have a nice day!
David.-