When Now Meets Then
It’s such a funny thing when the new and exciting eclipses the old and cherished. The new becomes positively more exciting and the old becomes increasingly more cherished. So much so in fact, that a person might want to throw herself into that newness with utter abandon. Let the thrill of the experience wash over her in wave after wave of terrible excitement. That same person might also want to stop exactly where she is and sink indefinitely deeper into her chair. Pull her sweater a little closer and curl up beside the warmth of every fond memory of everything she had ever enjoyed in life, and never move again.
It’s in this funny place that you would find her right now. A place where time stands reverently still as the irresistible draw forward meets the stubborn longing for the past. Armed with a cozy sweater and the cooler weather that warranted it, she sat at one of her favorite coffee shops and pondered all these things.
Life, and perhaps something more, was taking her in one direction but her heart spoke to her of all the things she loved about now. In another time and place, she would be thinking about all the circumstances that would surround such events. But for now, all she could ask herself was, “why?” Why should she move away from all that she loved into something so foreign and unknown?
“Why not?” her heart replied. Perhaps it was the enchantment of the strange place she found herself in, perhaps her heart spoke of deeper truths. Why not do the new and terrifying thing? Why not take the opportunity? The familiar would always be accessible and able to be found again, she thought, but every new thing was a singular experience. And every one of those singular experiences would grow her into something she could never be if she stayed exactly where she was.
The mug was warm between her hands as she sipped some of the foam off the top of her latte. Resolve steadily filled her soul. Yes, she thought, forward is the only direction one should move.
As The Decision settled in her soul, both the excitement and the nostalgia washed over her again. But this time they whispered to her such specifics as she hadn’t considered before. Memories flitted by of little moments that she often missed as she ploughed through life in her variety of routines. Vague impressions morphed into definite imaginings of a life that up until then, were only hints of a dream.
In that magical moment, she entertained a thousand little thoughts without any fear. Because those details, she mused, are the very things that made up our lives. Without them, there is no practical form for the new experiences. Without them, there is nothing to remember of the cherished old.
She swallowed the last of her drink and gathered her things. Even as she moved, the newness of that experience–her recent thoughts, the pleasant aromas, the atmosphere created by many minds at work–all began their transformation into the old. Just as every scene one has ever lived becomes like a snapshot, the moment slipped into memory. The sweetness of that brief encounter became something to be savored again and again as time went on. Armed with the coziness of the old wrapped securely around her heart, she jumped wholly and completely into the beautiful terror of the new.