Two years ago my best friend broke up with me....
Before I start describing my experience, I would like to note that this is a story about forgiving someone who never apologized, and loving someone who is not even a part of my world any longer. My life is awesome and I have many great people who are "team krista". I have a great family and I am ridiculously happy. So please, no one feel sad for me. Celebrate everything, even pain teaches us things.
Two years ago my best friend broke up with me, it absolutely broke my heart. I met Laurie in school, when I was 15 years old, so when our friendship ended she had been "my person" for 17 years. We stayed close even in adulthood, I stood up in her wedding, and she held my hand as my middle son was born. She was the person I needed at times when my world was shattering, and the first person I wanted to tell good news to. Her kids lovingly called me "aunt" krista. The end of the friendship was abrupt, and was completely devastating for me. Sometimes, things really do happen to us.
Pain changes people, but it also teaches us things.
The first year without her was rough, I hated 2016. I was randomly sad often. I eventually ended up taking anything that she had gifted me over the years and even things that reminded me of her and boxing it all up. I tried reaching out to her a few times. I thought I deserved some sort of open discussion, I yearned for closure. I kept waiting to get mad, I wanted to be mad at her. It never happened, my heart continued to be sad. I still don't blame her for hurting me, she did what she thought was necessary for her to heal.
She had her own reasons for cutting me out of her life, and it isn't my place to openly discuss them. I did not do anything to cause it to happen, it stemmed from old hurts, that had nothing to do with me. I was sitting here reflecting and wondering if she spared a thought for me today. There have been many times when I have needed her for both my down times and all the ups in the past two years, but per her request I have left her alone. What was is no longer. I am still not mad, but I still miss her. I no longer get randomly sad about it though. I hope that it helped her to heal. I hope that whatever is going on in her life she is ridiculously happy and I hope she still realizes that I love her endlessly.
~krazykrista
I'm sorry for the loss of your friend. Old friendships are priceless because over time through all the ups and downs you build a bond of trust. I hope you will grow from this and be able to build that bond again in new friendships.
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I am lucky to have some really great friends that have been around for a long time. The universe has a sick sense of humor sometimes. Thanks for the continued support.
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I will have to talk to my best friend and ask her if she is cool with me sharing our story. We have had our break ups and getting back together after long breaks. I figure if me and her can get passed our shit anyone can. So there can still be hope for getting back together.
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Thanks for the encouragement tecnos, I still love her, and would openly welcome her reentering my life, but some things cant be undone,so I think the relationship would look/function differently....hope you are well <3
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This is an important topic - I think it's not only natural, but healthy to "shed" friends. Of course, if you shed 100% of your friends, well...might be time to look inward. But as we live, we grow (hopefully) and many of our friends don't grow with us. Or they grow in a different direction. And it's time to let them go.
~ Kevin
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Thank you for the insight. As I age I find it is more difficult to form lasting bonds.
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You're lucky if you have the same friends after a year. People don't change. However, their wants change. The best you can do is reciprocate. I'm in sales. Our company teaches us not to hound after those who don't want our product. You are the product. The best you can do is reach out to her every so often and make new friends in the meantime. She may or may not want you back, but that shouldn't affect your life. Otherwise, you aren't living. Hope this helps...
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Wow... A friend's girlfriend went through a similar experience some time ago. And it went exactly like you described. She has felt not madness, but sadness in its stead. And she does even now. People are strange...
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I really truly wanted to be mad, it felt like that should be part of the grieving process, but it never occurred.
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Wow ....i almost cry reading .....nice post maam
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You are strong and amazing person. Forgiveness is one of the best tools that should be used more often.
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You remain one of my favorite humans <3 and I super miss you, maybe ill try to call and have a coffee date with you one day this week...all the love
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Aww schucks. thank you!!!!
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One of the most painful break up I had was with my best friend of 18 years in 2016. But I got over it with the birth of my son. People change but time heals all. Glad you are happy
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big hugs coming your way.
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Thank you, and I always try to remember everything in the universe happens for a reason. Big hug back to you also :)
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Close friendships are almost like a marriage. When you stop talking or seeing each other it is just weird. lol
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That made me tear up a bit not gonna lie. Losing someone is never easy especially someone you love dearly.
I'm happy that you don't get randomly sad anymore and I hope you get that closure you've been yearning for!
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happy for today!
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i enjoy your post ^^! Thanks.
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sorry about that
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Always come with the best @krazyykrista thank you very much
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good!.
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