This is the continuation of the story I'm creating entitled "Live Confession..." (links to previous sections located above...)
I ended up moving into Shogun's house in April of my 28th revolution...
There are many stories to tell about that experience, but in order to remain on the topic of confession, I'll leave most of that for a later time...
I met many other beings during my stay, and was formerly introduced to some very esoteric ideas I had never encountered before in my life; via some very interesting characters with some very incredible insights.
Some of these characters appeared extroardinary social creatures on the surface, others appeared mentally distraught insanity incarnate, and still others appeared everyday everybodies with normal lives... but in the plane of reality where the insights were exchanged, only the insights were of any matter...
There was also quite a bit of alcohol and drug consumption going on... and before everyone jumps on me about how this is the cause of my heartache and embarrassment, I want to say that I get it...
I have used many drugs in my life, both legal and illegal. I can't really say why I sought so much inner satisfaction externally other than because of simple curiosity and an exaggerated desire to be accepted...
I've learned a great deal about drugs in the process, though; mostly about which ones to avoid. What I am left with are marijuana (which I am still uncertain is the best choice for me in the excessive degree in which I use it) and psychadelics (i.e. LSD, hallucinogenic mushrooms, DMT, mescaline). (Always in careful moderation, of course.)
It may seem that I am confessing to being a drunk and a drug addict, but I assure you that I do not wish to confess this here. Instead, I wish to discuss a few of my experiences...
Marijuana has been a constant companion since the late part of my 15th revolution. You can tell by my early criminal history, mostly possession charges and driving shit...
Did you know that you have to have insurance to have a driver's license? Even without owning a car?... Or at least I do...
Fuck the system... I mean damn, something, but not this... They try to woo you in and make you think it's all nice and fair and shit; all the while, they're bleeding you dry until you wither away to nothing... but I need to get back on track...
haha, I smoked all through those last couple of paragraphs... Kind of the reason why I think I need a break...
I love her though... Marijuana... She is medicine to me... She helps me get over things, and not get too stressed out... Without her, I would get too worked up and obtuse in my thinking... She helps me step back and see solutions to things I would otherwise miss in anger or sadness or fear or joy...
But yeah, if I'm not careful, she makes me her bitch, and takes over my life... oh, and the paranoia...
Overall, I must be thankful, though, for she has opened me up to many other beings that I have connected with all along the way...
The first time I ever got a glimpse of the big picture, I used Ketamine to hit the K-hole. And I know this may not be considered a "psychadelic", but it was done in a "very scientific manner" with "carefully measured doses" to achieve the "desired psychadelic properties". So all I can say is, if you don't know what you're doing, dont try it...
But yeah, what an incredibly awesome experience; I soared far off into the cosmos/ether and became aware of an essence/energy/entity of which I can only describe as the life force stream...
At least it seemed that way in what I experienced on a mental and spiritual level... on a physical level, Shogun described it as "slow moving assholes speaking gibberish"... (He was miffed at something or another and decided to sit out on the experience.)
In any case, I decided I wasn't afraid to die that day, but I also discovered that I couldn't just leave without fulfilling my purpose...
...I was tethered to this physical body...
Anyways, what I learned travelling back, what I was able to ascertain from a perspective so high; allowed me to understand how truly infinitesimally insignificant my personal problems were to the grand scheme of things...
...the important thing was to Learn from everything...
...and still, everything has its purpose...
I have used mushrooms on multiple occasions, no more than ten I suppose. The effects have differed from time to time, mostly because of the different types, I'm sure.
On one occasion I took a tiny amount of a very potent batch... Awesomeness. Pure exhilaration! The best way to describe what I experienced is being aware of the ability to see things you normally could only sense...
Its like I would look down at the table top, covering my face, laughing uncontrollably. I would then close my eyes to try to regain some composure. Expecting darkness when closing my eyes, I was greeted with a vision of the energy of the auras of every living creature that was in the room with me: each with its own distinct color and unique pattern.
Absolutely unprepared for such a realization, I continued to laugh uncontrollably down to myself, occasionally peeking out to look and see if the movements I was tracking with eyes closed coincided with the ones I would glance upon in our visual, tangible reality.
Great times. Its where this kid, the Blue Knight as I knew him, starting calling me "the many levels of Eli"... excuse me Live, I go by Live now.
Oh yeah, the name's Live by the way. My main philosophy in life is to protect and nurture the youth, because they are our future; and to respect and care for our elders, because it is because of they that we are here... then that leaves everything in between, you and I, the doers... what are we supposed to be doing again? Oh yeah, ensuring that both of the first two objectives are acheived as well as creating the fuck out of this reality...
My way of doing things is that I always keep moving forward, never backward, and there's good reason for that, but I'll tell you about that later. Ha ha, what an introduction...
So yeah... sadness... confessions... strange occurences and events... alcohol abuse... drug excursions... what else can I say here? And more importantly, how is this all related?
I wanted to continue on with drug experiences, but I gather that to do so wouldn't really help with my confession very much. I do want to bring up ecstasy or mdma, but I'll save that for later since it's some pretty cool shit...
I could go into detail about everything I've studied and learned, like I did with the drugs, but I don't think that will help much with the confession either. I prefer now to switch gears again, and discuss specific observations I have made...
...to be continued...
All images were taken by the author's cell phone camera at various locations.
Peace