A little rant about making time where there is none

shapeshifter43 (58) in writing • 7 years ago

I didn’t blog as much as I wanted to this week, and I’m bummed about it.

There is never enough time. I used to tell myself, that’s no excuse, just MAKE time. But making time where there is none takes work and energy and I just don’t have it right now.

Making time means rearranging your schedule, sleeping less, trading one thing for another to free up a little window of opportunity. For example, right now, I could be working on my company’s website, but I chose to write this post instead—because it feels necessary to take a minute to whine, to send up a flare to the rest of this community that I’m trying and probably failing at being as present here as I want to be. Because sometimes a little missive, even one that commiserates, feels more productive than actually working.

My last post was about getting up early in the morning to write and work before my little guy wakes up. I sounded like I had the time balance thing all worked out, didn’t I? Hahahahahaha.

There is a book in me that wants to come out. There is an essay I have to write for a mag that accepted my latest pitch. There is a manuscript in progress by a student of a mine that I should be commenting on; there is a writing retreat that needs to be planned. There is my 100 memoirs project, which I announced three weeks ago but still haven’t completed the first post. When I think about everything that needs doing, I just want to take a protest nap.

(Photo by Flickr user Lucy Maude Ellis, Creative Commons license)

There is also dinner. There is always dinner. All the dinners I have to plan, shop for, prep for, create, clean up after… For someone who loves to cook and eat, I sure am feeling resentful about all the damn dinners.

So, this is just a note to say to anyone out there who is feeling like this, like they can’t possibly complete everything they set out to do and are feeling bad about it: me too. I see you. You aren’t alone. We can do this, just not as perfectly as we’d like sometimes.

And it’s ok to whine a little, too. xoxo

writing life balance time productivity

7 years ago by shapeshifter43 (58)

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denmarkguy (76) · 7 years ago

@shapeshifter43; I hear you, I feel you.

There is so much "stuff and nonsense" out there about making time and time management and what have you... but these moments generally lead me back to ONE place... examining whether or not I simply have too much on my plate. Period.

I remember reading one of those work-guru-wisdom newletters once, and a guess columnist made a very valid point: There is only one TRUE answer to the issue of feeling overworked and out of time... and it is not "time management;" it is quite simply doing less.

Of course, that always brings up a stream of arguments and rationalizations from people, usually starting with "But you can't just..."

"Can't just"... what? Maybe what we need more than anything is to take inventory of what we feel life "should" contain... and ask "is that realistic?"

Meanwhile, pardon me while I get back to planning the next great American Novel!

Loved the post!

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shapeshifter43 (58) · 7 years ago

Thank you so much for your validating comments. Yes, we often need to do less in order to accomplish more (how guru did that sound? haha). I have to get better at saying, you know what, tonight I'm ordering pizza. Tomorrow I'm not cleaning anything. This weekend, all I hope to finish is this book. When I'm relaxed and feel rejuvenated, then it doesn't feel like so tall a task to squeeze in one more to-do-list item. Really appreciate your comment--followed you!

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cryptowrite (37) · 7 years ago

We can make anything happen, but not everything. Sometimes we have to prioritize one good thing over another good thing. I'm putting my heart and soul into the book I'm writing. I've given up my weekends and time after work to write this thing. It's happening and it trumps everything else at the moment. So I implore you to get out and make it happen, because anyone can, but most will choose not to.

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shapeshifter43 (58) · 7 years ago

Thank you for the encouragement, and best wishes for your book! I followed you so I can check in on your progress and give you a boost if you need one, just like you gave me. :)

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leta-blake (60) · 7 years ago

I'm there too. I woke in the night the other day from a panic attack over all the responsibilities I haven't been able to tackle due to time spent on other responsibilities. It's hard to know sometimes what the most important thing is when it comes to such divergent and important responsibilities as mothering, working, writing, being a friend/family member, taking care of my health, etc. I really need to take a time out and sort out a priority list so that I know what is the most important thing, otherwise I just spin out into anxiety. Thanks for this post and letting me know I'm not alone. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who can't figure out how to balance a life.

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shapeshifter43 (58) · 7 years ago

You are by far not the only one who can't figure out how to balance life. It's just that life, and those priority lists, shift and change all the time, no? I'm sorry you're having panic attacks. I can relate! I hope you are practicing good self-care and remembering that you can't do everything, every day. Sending love, and following. <3

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abue (45) · 7 years ago

Life in

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acwood (60) · 7 years ago

Time. Yeah. It just keeps moving forward.
I would love to write more posts.
The only time I can seem to get is on one of my days off. The other one is for shopping, chores, etc.
Philosophically speaking, I guess I could say I have just the right amount of time.
Nice post .
Thanks for sharing.
...upvoted followed and resteemed

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shapeshifter43 (58) · 7 years ago

Thank you! And yes, "just the right amount of time"--that perspective is my life goal. Followed you back. :)

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cryptophoenix (25) · 7 years ago

I really feel you... everybody has these struggles, but I noticed that I felt this feeling of not controlling my schedule when I lost sight on what the purpose was of the things I was doing atm.

You just need a step back for 5-15 min and get to what the underlying point is of the work you are doing. You should be fine afterwards, it should all settle down for a couple of days/week(s) :)

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shapeshifter43 (58) · 7 years ago

Agree. It 's a control thing for sure. I think especially for writers or artists, we are trained to think we can't turn down any opportunity to get our work out there, which leads to being over-extended, which leads to probably shoddy work, or work that doesn't get done. I'm trying to exercise a well-timed NO every once in a while. But your point about keeping sight of the big picture isn't lost on me, so thanks for that. :)

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cryptophoenix (25) · 7 years ago

You're welcome! glad to atleast have helped someone a bit today :)

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jobsande (47) · 7 years ago (edited)

Totally agree about making time - exactly what I've been doing here...even though I have a full time job, I don't see this as "work", more like a fun investment that may (fingers crossed!) snowball at some point down the road and eventually pay off.. and if not, it was still worth making a few friends here :)

To be fair, it's probably a lot easier for me to make time, as a single guy, than you as a parent!

Upvoted, followed and resteemed!

PS - What does the red wine image have to do with making time? Always making time for wine? hehe don't need to tell me that :P

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shapeshifter43 (58) · 7 years ago

If I'm whining, I should probably be wining, was my point. ;) Homonyms! Thanks for reading, commenting, following, upvoting, resteeming, and being kind! Followed you back.