Stress brings me peace... Until I didn't have to

in writing •  6 years ago 

It’s funny really (let’s call it ‘funny’ and not concerning, as ‘concerning’ would make me feel, well, concerned), but I recently became aware of me being more at peace while being busy as opposed to when I’m not.
The setting: I moved back in with my parents a year ago, due to some family reasons. Couple of months after that, I broke both my bones in one leg… You could say I was kind of ‘set on the bench’ to play in my own game of life. So I eventually ‘was forced’ / ‘enjoyed’ a full 5-month-period of simply having to pause and do ab-so-lu-tely nothing. Sounds like one of those moments you could just do what you want, right? Time to right a book, learn a new language, meet people you didn’t manage to before,…
I’ve never felt as stressed as I was during that time.
Only one week before my leg was ‘kaput’, I started a new job at a startup. Naturally, I was a rather expensive liability to deal with when you’re just building out a business, so we agreed to talk again after I recovered. Which was perfectly fine as I wasn’t worried about ‘losing’ a job. I just found it, and there would be more of those after I’d gotten better as well.
As such, I should have been in an ideal situation to do all those things people say they’d do ‘if only they had the time’. Well, I did. And I didn’t do (or had to do) shit.
TBC

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