Do you ever judge other people? Deal with the narcissist inside you

How do you overcome any difficulty? How do you let go of an unhealthy behavior pattern, feeling, or emotion?

How do you let go of a garden hose?

First, you must become AWARE that you are holding a garden hose. Until you actually know about the garden hose that is in your hand, you'll never be able to let go of it.
You won't even know it's there.

To let go of narcissism, you must become fully AWARE of it. The good news is that this is quite simple. Whenever you are JUDGING other people, that is narcissism!

So step one is to simply notice. Simply catch yourself, notice when your mind is in judgment.

Let's make something clear before I go on.

People are not their behaviors, body, and mind. Those are just "stuff" that they have and do.

Human Beings. Think about that. Human... BEINGS.

Those are two separate things, aren't they?

There is the HUMAN - Flesh, fat, skin, bones, brain, kidneys, etc.

And there is the BEING - Some people call it Life energy.
Some people call it the Higher Self. Some call it the Soul. Some people call it Spirit, or God. Some call it Consciousness.

It is real.

When a human being dies, they INSTANTLY LOSE 21 GRAMS OF BODYWEIGHT.

Why?

It's because they're fuckin' DEAD!

The consciousness (or Soul or whatever you choose to call this) has left the body. And this "consciousness" is very REAL ELECTROMAGNETIC ENERGY. Do your homework - check out some Quantum Physics.

It's this understanding that makes non-judgment possible in the first place.

Judgmental people only see HUMANS, they do not see the BEING. Human Being.

Some of you are still stuck in the following:

"If I cannot SEE it, I will refuse to acknowledge it."

It's called ignorance, and many, many humans are really ignorant. That's not a judgment, it's a cold, hard fact.
Take a look around you!

"I won't believe it until I see it."

But you cannot see oxygen either.

The moon causes the tides to rise... you can't see THAT electromagnetic frequency, but y'all know this is a fact.
Letting go of this fundamental ignorance is KEY.

Anybody who refuses to acknowledge the "beingness" that is within themselves and other people and the flowers and the worms and the dolphins and the Earth and the Universe will never know true Peace, Love, Awareness.

Sure, they may feel glimpses of it from time to time, but that is fleeting.

I don't judge PEOPLE, but I do make judgments about their BEHAVIORS.

For example, killing and raping people is a very ignorant thing to do. But can you see BEYOND the behaviors? When you can, COMPASSION sets in.

So how do we "cure" ourselves of narcissism?

Catch your brain whenever it judges people. In that moment, you might want to ask yourself, "How is this person reflecting back to me something I need to know about MYSELF?"

For example, let's say that you judge people who lack integrity. You have no compassion for them, only ANGER.
Resentment. Judgment. PITY.

Feeling sorry for people is NOT compassion.

I once had a friend who often said, "I hate liars!" Low and behold, he turned out to be one of the biggest liars I've ever known.

So that is the time to go within and look at yourself.
Face your own lack of integrity, and do this without judging yourself for it. SIMPLY NOTICE IT.

Awareness is the Only Way.

When people piss you off, make you feel defensive, and "make" you feel stress, it's really a gift! They are showing you that there is something that you need to become more aware of inside yourself.

BE GRATEFUL.

You will always attract the kind of people into your life that will indirectly point out the imbalances that you have. When the above-mentioned friend came into my life and turned out to be a liar with all kinds of hidden agendas, I had to stop and ask myself why I attracted this person into my life.

At first, I thought, "Well I don't lie to people like he does."

So I looked DEEPER.

I realized that while I wasn't going out of my way to deliberately screw people over, I was, in fact, lying to MYSELF. I was lying to myself every time I ignored my initial intuitions about him. You could say that the Universe sent this person to me so that I could face this.
The Universe always sends the right people, circumstances, events, and "coincidences" to your door.

It's the Universe's way of asking you to LOOK WITHIN. But most people don't.

When I say, "The world is your mirror" it doesn't necessarily mean your EXACT mirror. I wasn't a con artist like this guy was, but I needed to master the art of "lie detection". It was a weakness that I had, but thanks to this person I now have a finely-tuned bullshit detector.

Another example: I get asked advice from women that are in abusive relationships.

What they don't realize is that THEY are also abusive.
They delude themselves into feeling like victims, when the reality is that they are abusive as well. For one thing, they abuse THEMSELVES.

This happens on so many levels. Even just talking down to yourself, using a nasty tone with yourself in your own head IS SELF-ABUSIVE. You are either loving yourself, or abusing yourself. In entropy or in decay. Choosing Life or choosing Death.

Most people teeter between both...

Again, she might not go around beating up her own lovers, but she has, on some level, the energies of abuse inside herself. So she will attract an extreme example of that energy, in this case a guy who beats the crap out of her.

If she judges this man and simply hates him, she will remain in denial and learn nothing. On the other hand, if she stops to ask herself, "Why did I attract this man into my life? What do we have in common?" she will solve the problem. It's called taking responsibility - a concept that few people truly understand.

So whenever you catch your brain judging other people, that is the time to go within. How are you really just judging yourself?

Again, some people just DON'T GET THIS CONCEPT. Denial is a very strong energy, sucking them into their own brain/ego and taking them hostage.

Let me give you another example.

Just LOOKING at her gives you a "chubby". She's a beautiful playboy model. She's hot. She's physically perfect. And she knows it.

She KNOWS that she is beautiful compared to most women.
She stands above the crowd, there is no denying it... her beauty is exactly what it is.

What do you think is REALLY going on when that same girl sees a fat girl walking by... and she thinks, "Yuck. That girl is ugly... how gross"?

How is this fat girl really showing her anything about herself? After all, she's a supermodel! On the outside, these women have nothing in common. One is hot, the other is... not.

That may be so, but I guarantee you that the supermodel secretly judges herself. She might know that she is MUCH more attractive than the fat girl, but at the end of the day she will go home, look in the mirror, and say, "My ass isn't shaped quite right. My breasts are not large enough. There's a small wrinkle! Cellulite! Dirty pores!"

Whatever. She judges herself.

Oovercoming judgment/narcissism is quite simple, but not for the weak. Simply catch your brain whenever it judges someone, and then go within. Find out where your own similar imbalances are. Become aware of them. Only then can you truly make a CHOICE.