´´Change is the only constant ´´
Those words have been stuck in my mind ever since I first heard them. It is both a blessing and a curse. Looking in the back mirror at all the things I have gone through, I really see how much change affects life. At only 21 the physical change is of cause big, but the way I'm handling different stations, the way I think and the way I feel about sustain things has changes dramatically. The last two years especially. Two years ago I was still in school. Last year of the nightmare high school was. Frustration, depression and anxiety are the words describing my three years of high school. Not about schoolwork, but social anxiety and a depressing home front. After graduation all of those feelings disappeared. I could take on the world. goodbye see you never to those fuckers. Got a girlfriend. Felt trapped in tiny Denmark and started travelling. Belgium was the destination, where my girlfriend lives. Worked at a hostel, which was the best thing i have ever done. Listening to stories at the bar, seeing how change affects all people you meet, some even others than me. They made me see the world in a different light. Going back home was hard. Going back to work even harder. Worked at a school along side my old teachers. When you have been out among so many different nationalities and so many exotic thoughts, working at a school makes you feel old and trapped. Anx started again and my relationship started falling apart. everything i thought I had and everything I thought i knew changed. I didn't change fast enough with it and it hit me in the butt.
I just came home from my second longer trip to Belgium working at the same hostel. I went down there fearing i might not have a relationship coming back. I went to be myself too. Away from family asking what you are doing with your life, when the only answer you can think of is "trying to follow the changes around me fast enough". Of cause it didn't go as planed! That said what my trip turned out to be was much better than what i could have dreamed of. Met some fantastic people and ended up cancelling my first flight home and staying for a little longer. There stories and the hours spend talking with my girlfriend set my mind straight again. My way of thinking almost turned 180 degrees, again changing and adapting.
I'm not writing this to share a piece of my life or for you to get to know me. I know none of you would give two shits about my life, and with good reason. If we were to give a shit about everyone who writes something about them selves on the internet we would do nothing else. I'm writing to make you think. What i have been trying to say with way too many words and half my life story is: Use and enjoy what you know! Before long it has changed and you are left thinking "WTF just happend?". Change is the only constant, so accept that its there and adapt to it. You don't necessarily have to encourage changes, but you cant deny it so better live with it.