11 tips from Roman Abramovich

in abramovich •  7 years ago 

1.Many of the problems are of the mind. They are not the result of any event, failure, or actions of other people. They arise because of our bad mental habits. Freed from these 10 behaviors and immediately get rid of many problems caused by each of them:

2.Do not jump to conclusions. This habit can make life difficult in two ways. First, we think we know what's going to happen, so disable their attention, and begin to act on the basis of this assumption. People good prophets. Most of their assumptions are wrong, and hence wrong and their actions. The second side of this habit — we imagined that the ability to read thoughts, and as if know why other people do what they do, or what they think. Wrong again, and wrong. This nonsense destroys relationships like no other.

3.Do not dramatize. Inflate a deadly catastrophe of small failures, and react accordingly. The habit of making mountains out of molehills breeds anxiety, which either does not exist or is so small that nothing to worry about. Why they do that? Who knows? Can be to look and feel more important. In any case, it is just as foolish as detrimental.

4.Do not invent rules. A huge part of all these "must" and "should" that you are so concerned about, probably useless. All they give you is nervousness and guilt. Why? Following these imaginary rules, you score the brain of unnecessary barriers and childish orders. And when you try to transfer these rules on others, then turn into a frightening tedious whiner or arrogant fanatic.

5.Avoid stereotypes and labels. The words you use, can you substitute. The language of negativity and criticism generates the same thinking. Trying to cram things in certain categories, you stop seeing their real value, thereby limiting their thinking to an absolute futility. Go see what's happening. Don't hang labels. You'll be surprised at what you see.

6.Don't be a perfectionist. Life is not only "black or white" or "all or nothing". In most cases, "enough" means just enough. If you're looking for the perfect job, you most likely will never find it. All other works will seem to you worse than they really are. Will be looking for a perfect relationship and probably will spend the rest of my life alone. Perfectionism is a mental illness that will not allow you to enjoy and every time to send you on a quest for what is not.

7.Do not generalize. One or two failures is not a sign of permanent failure. And accidental triumph doesn't turn you into a genius. Single event — good or bad — or even two or three events do not always indicate a prolonged trend. As a rule, things are what they are, and nothing more.

8.Do not take to heart. Most people, even your friends and colleagues, don't speak, don't think or care about you 99% of the time. People from your organization or neighborhood even, probably, never about you and not heard. Yes, in fact, does not want to hear. Life's UPS and downs, warmth and indifference of other people have personally to do with you. If they pretend, it will only make you feel more miserable than you have to.

9.Do not believe the emotions. What you feel is not always a good indicator of what's really going on. Just because you feel it doesn't mean it's true. Sometimes the source of emotions could serve as fatigue, hunger, irritation, or just a cold. You feel good or bad, the future will not change. Feelings can be true, but they are not the truth.

10.Do not succumb to apathy. Train yourself to be optimistic. If you expect bad things in life and at work, you will find them. Negative mood is the same that to look at the world through the distorted, dirty glasses. You'll notice only the shortcomings, ignoring, or not noticing anything else. It's just amazing how you can see what is not there, if only to start looking. And, of course, if you begin to look for positive things, you will find them too.

11.Don't live in the past. This advice is most important of all: forget and live on. Most of anger, frustration, unhappiness and despair in this world comes from people clinging to past grievances and problems. The more you scroll through them in mind, the larger they seem, the worse you will feel. Don't fight misfortune. Forget and live on. Do this, and thereby depriving him of power to hurt you.

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