Do not argue with your lover, do your own thing and keep your mouth in check, there is nothing to win by arguing, not without hurting the relationship. The trick is how to not get attached to the expectations, by having none, the micromanagement of little details, the Devil is there, and don't go berserk over small irrelevant shit.
Also, leave your past in the past, do not bring it into now. It takes away from now and here and thus you miss the boat with opportunities it has to offer, hence no good future can be made because all that time was spent on mulling over some past memories that have little to nothing to do with reality now and what future it has to offer.
If your partner is too much drag for you, then leave, no point to be with someone you argue with all the time, find someone else to share your life who will help you to ascend to a better life, not bring you down.
Many people mistake being horny for being in love, a common folly. One has to love oneself first, as God loves all. If one does not love oneself how can one love anyone else? One has to have it first in order to give it. The Golden Rule. Reap what you sow. If you plant love seeds then love harvest you shalt have. However the seeds should be in fertile ground with plenty of good weather.
Usually they themselves do not understand what they have and who they are. They get attracted to each other out of lust first and/or some perceived opportunity for stability. This is marriage of convenience and familiarity driven by the sense of belonging and security, all dressed up in some past melodramas and memories bound together by tragedies and addictions, self pity and victimhood. It may serve its purpose, but much to improve indeed. However this is not the true love.
The true Love requires the sacrifice of yourself for the other, that is why only the love of God is worthy of it. The Agape Love. ♡
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