Hi,
I need your help because I am beginning to dislike the way I am. Six months ago I went through a pompous break up from my ex-boyfriend after which I managed to recover myself a bit, enough to begin to notice the more or less tempting suggestions around me. It turned out that all my friends have been romantically interested in me all along and one of them even managed to touch me emotionally.
So what is the problem?
The problem is that I am afraid that I cannot fall in love at this moment. I don’t know if this inability is related to this guy or if it is my own personal lack of readiness. I am afraid that I might have put up a lot of protective walls and that I have lost the key…
Or perhaps it’s because I am not specifically attracted to him… and if so, could it be that I am attracted only to the type of people that resemble my ex?
Shena
Shena,
I have written before that if there was no attraction then it would not a good idea to have a relationship. The click is important and signifies high levels of love energies that accompany your relationship.
Every feeling that passes through us is real including your fear. Your bothersome concerns – “I might not fall in love again”; “I have lost the key”; and “perhaps I have put up a lot of protective walls” – are all true. The question is what can you do about it?!
If you repress these feelings, sweep them under the carpet, and go out with someone just to prove to yourself that “you still have it” or just to test your ability to feel something, you will undoubtedly hurt yourself and your walls will only get higher and bulkier.
What bothers you is how to reignite that wonderful feeling of infatuation and love. Some would say that love will enter your life anyway; sooner or later you will fall in love no matter what. “It’s only a question of time”, they would say. And opportunities for love will indeed always show themselves, but if you don’t allow them to manifest they will stay hidden, outside of your immediate reality.
As a human being, there is something that you can do to make the energy of life flow again in your soul and body. This something very much resembles the magic with which the shamans have made the rain come.
Credit: tvtropes
When the drought was too severe the tribe addressed the old man, the sorcerer, and asked them to force the rain to come. The magician would then go to the countryside, sit on the ground, pick up a handful of soil, smell it, mumble some words and then sit quietly and wait. A day would pass, two days would pass, twenty days would pass and then suddenly, out of nowhere, the sky would darken and soon heavy rain would fall. For the tribal people and outsiders, the occurrence of rain would seem like magic and the old man would be a great magician, a demigod.
The truth is a little different. The process that the shaman used is the same that you can use to create infatuation and then love.
As always the secret was within the shaman, and in your case within you. The creation of a new relationship, of a new love, is not through the alteration of reality. It is neither through the coherence of, or the battle against outside circumstances. The shaman did not create rain clouds; they have always been there, dormant, a potential. What he did was allow them to come when the conditions were right (so it took that period of time).
The same with love. Your next invigorating relationship already exists. You only need to allow it, to create conditions inside, the inner ripeness that will put the right mattress in front of your infatuation, waiting for its arrival.
Everything begins and ends with you, what you choose and what you allow. Once you are ready, just sit and wait (figuratively, of course). It will come. There isn’t another way.
Go inside, Shena, release your little fears and concerns, refine your choices, ponder and learn the lessons from your past relationship if you will (but not too much), and then, with no pressure, and with lots of self-reliance, wait for the rain.
That is to say, for love.
