CHAPTER 1 -- The Great Deception
Normal is not something to aspire to,
it’s something to get away from.
~ Jodie Foster
THE “MTV CRIBS” EPISODE THAT NEVER HAPPENED
Host: “Today we visit 22-year-old Big Daddyhoo and his 8,000-square-foot crib here on the
beautiful Atlantic coastline live from sunny Palm Beach Florida . . . so, Big Daddyhoo, tell us
about your rides!”
Big Daddyhoo: “Yo dawg, we gotz the Ferrari F430 over there with the 22-inch rims, the sick
Lamborghini Gallardo over there with the custom 10-speaker stereo, and for those nights when
I just wanna chillax with the ladies, the Rolls Royce Arnage does my do.”
Host: “So, Big Daddyhoo, how can you afford all these gorgeous rides? And this mansion on the
beach? It must have cost more than $20 million!”
Big Daddyhoo: “Yo let me tell you dawg, Big Daddyhoo got rich chilling in mutual funds and
popping phat money in my 401(k) down at my Win-Go Wireless job.”
Suddenly, you hear a record screech off the turntable.
Silence.
As you can imagine, this scenario would never happen. Big Daddy’s answer is preposterous and
laughable. We’re smart enough to know that wealthy 22-year-old kids don’t get rich investing
in mutual funds and stashing money in their 401(k)s from their job at the cell phone store. We
know that people who get rich young fall into a unique subset of society: pro athletes, rappers,
actors, entertainers, and famous people. Those of us outside this demography are left with the
traditional advice showered upon us by financial expertIt’s called “Get Rich Slow” and sounds something like this: Go to school, get good grades, graduate,
get a good job, invest in the stock market, max-out your 401(k), cut up your credit cards, and clip
coupons . . . then someday, when you are, oh, 65 years old, you will be rich.
“GET RICH SLOW” IS A LOSING GAME
If you want to get rich and “Get Rich Slow” is your strategy, I have bad news. It’s a losing game,
with your time wagered as the gamble. Do you seriously think that a guy who drives a $500,000
supercar and lives in that palatial beach estate got rich investing in mutual funds? Or clipping
coupons from the local Super-Saver? Of course we don’t. So why do we give credence to this
advice as a legitimate road that leads to wealth and financial freedom?
Show me a 22-year-old who got rich investing in mutual funds.
Show me the man who earned millions in three years by maximizing his 401(k).
Show me the young twenty-something who got rich clipping coupons.
Where are these people? They don’t exist. They’re fairy tales of impossibility.
Yet, we continue to trust the same old tired gang of financial media darlings who espouse these
doctrines of wealth. Yes sir, get a job, work 50 years, save, live frugal, invest in the stock
market, and soon, your day of freedom will arrive at age 70 . . . and if the stock market is kind
and you’re lucky, 60! Gee, doesn’t this “wealth in a wheelchair” financial plan sound exciting?
In today’s tumultuous financial climate, I am shocked people still believe these strategies even
work. Wasn’t it the recession that exposed “Get Rich Slow” for the fraud it is? Oh I get it, if you
are gainfully employed for 40 years and avoid 40% market downturns, “Get Rich Slow” works;
just sit back, work, and hope death don’t meet you first because, golly-gee, you’re going to be
the richest guy in the retirement home!
The message of “Get Rich Slow” is clear: Sacrifice your today, your dreams, and your life for a
plan that pays dividends only after most of your life has evaporated. Let me be blunt: If your
road to wealth devours most of your adult life and it’s not guaranteed, that road sucks. A “road
to wealth” ruled by time, populated by crooks, cons, and corporate manipulators with your life
wagered as the gamble is a dirty, rotten alley.
Nonetheless, the preordained plan continues to wield power, recommended and enforced by a
legion of hypocritical “financial experts” who aren’t rich by their own advice, but by their own
Millionaire Fastlane. The Slowlane prognosticators know something that they aren’t telling
you: What they teach doesn’t work, but selling it does
WEALTH YOUNG: IS IT BULLSHIT?
The Millionaire Fastlane isn’t about being retired old with millions, but about redefining wealth
to include youth, fun, freedom, and prosperity. Take this comment posted on the Fastlane
Forum:
“Is it bullshit? You know, the dream to be young and live the life—to own the exotic
cars, to own the dream house, to have free time to travel and pursue your dreams. Can
you really get free of the rat race young? I’m a 23-year-old investment banker in
Chicago, Illinois. I make a modest salary and modest commissions. By most people’s
standards, I have a good job. I hate it. I cruise Chicago’s downtown and I see some guys
living the life. Guys driving expensive exotic cars and I think to myself . . . They’re all
50 or older with silver hair! One of them once told me, ‘You know kid, when you finally
can afford a toy like this, you’re almost too old to enjoy it!’ The guy was a 52-year-old
real estate investor. I remember looking at him and thinking ‘God . . . that can’t be
true! It’s gotta be bullshit! It’s gotta be!’”
I can verify—it isn’t bullshit. You can live “the life” and still be young. Old age is not a
prerequisite to wealth or retirement. However, the real BS is thinking you can do it by the
default “Get Rich Slow” construct, at least by the time you hit your 30th birthday. Believing
that old age is a precursor to retirement is the real BS. The real BS is allowing “Get Rich Slow”
to steal your dreams.
REINVENT RETIREMENT TO INCLUDE YOUTH
Say “retirement” and what do you see? I see a crotchety old man on a porch in a creaky rocking
chair. I see pharmacies, doctor’s offices, walkers, and unsightly urinary undergarments. I see
nursing homes and overburdened loved ones. I see old and immobile. Heck, I even smell
something musty circa 1971. People retire in their 60s or 70s. Even at that age, they struggle to
make ends meet and have to rely on bankrupted government programs just to survive. Others
work well into their “golden years” just to maintain their lifestyle. Some never make it and
work until death.
How does this happen? Simple. “Get Rich Slow” takes a lifetime to travel and its success is
nefariously dependent on too many factors you cannot control. Invest 50 years into a job and
miserly living, then, one day, you can “finish rich” alongside your wheelchair and prescription
pillbox. How uninspiring.
Yet, millions undertake the 50-year gamble. Those who succeed receive their reward of
financial freedom with a stinking lump of turd: old age. Gee thanks. But don’t worry;
patronization rains from the heavens: “These are the golden years!” Who are they kidding?
Golden to whom?
Retirement is supposed to be life’s destination of financial freedom and leisure. But if the
journey devours 50 years of your life, is it worth it? A 50-year road to wealth isn’t compelling,
and because of it, few succeed and those who do settle for financial freedom in life’s twilight.
The problem with accepted norms of retirement is what you do not see. You don’t see youth,
you don’t see fun, and you don’t see the realization of dreams. The golden years aren’t golden
at all but a waiting room for death. If you want financial freedom before the Grim Reaper hits
the on-deck circle, “Get Rich Slow” isn’t the answer. Now if you’re under 30, don’t let this talk
of retirement scare you. Like the “Get Rich Slow” doctrines that serve them, you’re
preconditioned to associate retirement and the golden years with old age. It need not be this
way!
If you want to retire young with health, vibrancy, and hair, you’re going to need to ignore
society’s default “Get Rich Slow” roadmap and the gurus spoon-feeding you the slop in the
trough. There is another way.
CHAPTER SUMMARY: FASTLANE DISTINCTIONS
• “Get Rich Slow” demands a long life of gainful employment.”
• “Get Rich Slow” is a losing game because the game is played with your time.
• The real golden years of life are when you’re young, sentient, and vibrant.