Americans, No BitCoins For You!

If you dive into this world of cryptocurrency, as an American, you will need to become untraceable. I fear that the United States will make these activities illegal shortly when I say activities I mean the buying and selling of cryptocurrencies. It is the classic game of keeping the rich on top and stifling all those below. We must maintain the status quo.
I am in no way advocating that you should break any laws, you should as an American follow the plan put forth before you. Get educated and get a soul-crushing job where you work for the next thirty or forty years until retirement. During your life, be sure to stay in your place and aim for the average. You don’t want to be an outlier, don’t go for the most handsome guy in the classroom, you should stick with the average guy. Kids, if you plan on having any, you should hold with the average and have three point two children.

Don’t try to make any political change outside of the standard parameters; there is no use in protesting instead you should vote for one of the two major parties. Please buy into our system of two major political parties, if you think about it, there are only two ways to think about anything, either you are for or against it. Since it is not your job to come up with the ideas that you are going to be for or on leave that up to the think tanks, of course, they have your interest in mind. Don’t worry this is the greatest country in the world, and we have the smartest people thinking for you. If you do feel like complaining, make sure that all you do, consider the political system to be rigged and don’t vote, please just continue to protest, somebody will listen and magically make things right.

Since America is the land of opportunity, you do have the ability to increase your financial standings throughout your lifetime. The way to do this ethically and legally is through hard work. Accomplish this hard work after you have paid thousands of hours into our excellent educational system and spent countless hours studying arcane subjects so that you can become an expert. Once you have reached expert status, you should then find a job. You see you must rent out your life energy for money; it is too risky to start your own company. Maybe after you have paid into the system enough and you have enough contacts, you might be able to start your private business, but don’t forget to follow the myriad of rules and regulations designed to keep you and your customers safe. Oh, yeah be sure and save up enough money to pay for legal fees, just to be safe lets budget twenty percent of your savings for legal fees and another thirty percent for taxes. With the other fifty percent remaining your company will be a raging success, we are sure of it because we have structures in place to make sure everyone else is following the rules so you will be on a fair footing.

Risk, is dangerous, doing something risky is like gambling. We know you don’t want to gamble with your hard earned savings so don’t buy unsafe products. You want to invest; we would suggest savings bonds, they are backed up by the government, no safer investment. With our superior knowledge, we will help you avoid risky investments, we even call stocks securities, because we want them to be as safe and secure as possible. Please, check the bulletin and notices produced by the Security and Exchange Commission before you consider making any investments.

After years of investing and with an incredible amount of luck you may one day become an accredited investor. When you become an accredited investor feel free to ignore everything mentioned in the above paragraphs it no longer applies to you. You have made it to the place where you can make your own decisions without the hand holding of the American government, and the only requirement is that either you have a net worth of a million dollars excluding your home or you have earned an income of over two hundred thousand dollars in two subsequent years. When you have obtained this status, you can pretty much do whatever you want to do, welcome to the land of the free. When you finally get in this club, you will see what it is like to be a real American.

My friend Tillman has an idea. Tillman says, No one has gotten rich by following the rules because the rules are designed to keep you in your place. To rise out of your current state, you may have to break some laws, stupid regulations but rules nonetheless. The rule makers may say they are trying to keep you safe, i.e., it’s for your protection, they may not even know that they are playing into a rigged structure. They may also be making rules that cause themselves hardship; it’s hard to see the more significant fabric when you are a part of its very fibers. Don’t listen to my friend Tillman. The structure does not drive behavior, and we make our own safe choices because they are the best choices to make.

So ultimately, you should not buy BitCoin because it is not safe, it has not been sanitized by the United States government, so it is not a worthy investment to even consider. The same goes for Initial Coin Offerings (ICOs), most of them are already excluding American citizens and that my friend is a good thing. We would not want Americans getting mixed up into those kinds of risky investments, whom would they petition to when they lose all their money. If you buy BitCoin beware, we don’t know who is controlling it; it is much better to put your money into a treasury bond.