Why Men Cheat — SteemCN

Welcome to a tweet-cast on "Why Men Cheat" #SoulTies 8

I want to state that we are not here to condemn anyone or stigmatise anyone who has repeatedly fallen into sin due to #SoulTies
We are here to expose #SoulTies as the works of the enemy that the blood of Jesus has been shed to purge us from.
We are also not here to provide excuses and reasons for Christians to continue in sin due to a misunderstanding of grace. #SoulTies
The Bible states clearly in Romans 6:23 that "the wages of sin is death" #SoulTies is no excuse for us to continue in sin
We are here to work out our salvation (that Jesus already paid with His blood) from #SoulTies according to God's word.
In a few weeks from now our focus will shift to how we can practically work out our already purchased salvation from #SoulTies
Today we are attempting to answer a question, in the context of #SoulTies, I got asked many times, which is why do married men cheat.
Just before we dive into business, I want to tell you about our #SoulTies blog. http://www.BreakingSoulTies.com
http://www.BreakingSoulTies.com will be our single repository for all our #SoulTies resources. We have all the #SoulTies tweet casts there for you.
Also, you can send me your questions, testimonies & prayer points through the "Contact Us" page http://www.BreakingSoulTies.Wordpress.com/contactus/ #SoulTies
Also, you can listen to audio teachings on #SoulTies and other topics if u want to stay ahead of the class -> http://www.BreakingSoulTies.Wordpress.com/audio-downloads
Please visit d blog, leave your comments, spread the news about it using the FB, Twitter share buttons. http://www.BreakingSoulTies.Wordpress.com #SoulTies
We start with the scriptures as is our usual practice by reading from Eph 2:3. #SoulTies
Ephesians 2:3 Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh,..#SoulTies
Conversation there means our behavioural patterns and habits. The scripture is saying there that we sharpened these skills.. #SoulTies
.. With other children of disobedience when we were out there in the world or in Egypt aka when we were unbelievers. #SoulTies
Most #SoulTies we practise today were developed & fine-tuned in our friendship circles. #SoulTies
Hardly does satan come with new stuff to trip you but he uses the same old stuff over and over again to trip you. #SoulTies
Now that you are saved and you have your ticket punched for heaven, satan's only access to you is through your #SoulTies.
#SoulTies simply being habits he got you involved in the days of your flesh. Today, we are zeroing in on wrong sexual habits.
specifically in the lives of men. They operate slightly differently with women so our guns today are trained on the men. #SoulTies
I think I've mentioned before that many men process love through their organs and women process love through their hearts. #SoulTies
It explains why David saw another man's wife from afar & his interpretation of love towards her was sleeping with her #SoulTies
To conceal his activities with her, David went as far as killing her husband. After his death, the sex party continued. #SoulTies
Many men who are married today are still carrying on his torch and we want to do some trace through to see what's going on. #SoulTies
Boys that form sexual habits as they grow up without any godly restraint begin to move across various girls. #SoulTies
As this happens, the key excitement in sexual activity for boys is the release and physical gratification they get from it. #SoulTies
So fast forward to when they now want to marry either as saved or unsaved men, they have had a variety of memorable times. #SoulTies
Sisters in church are then naive to think that if he is in church, then he must be free from such memories & #SoulTies
Bear in mind that these activities were practised together with friends who are now split across d church and the world. #SoulTies
Naively, sisters under estimate the power of old relationships over the men they are now dating or marrying. #SoulTies
Let's paint a mock scenario here. Taju has been through having sex with 35 women before he gets saved and join d church. #SoulTies
No one taught him how to renew his mind with God's Word and all he knew was to come along to church and serve tables. #SoulTies
He still has a plethora of friends continuing with such girls. Now he meets sister in church, Tanya, who loves The Lord. #SoulTies
Tanya is a virgin and never had a boyfriend until she met Taju. Taju didn't disclose all these while they were dating. #SoulTies
Let's throw in a Nigerian spin to this mock scenario. Taju's family is delighted to hear Tanya is a virgin. #SoulTies
Taju's family is pleased with his catch being aware that he was once a player.They like that he's marrying a "clean" woman. #SoulTies
I have read a tweet where a dude said he would blow the whistle if his friend was to marry a lady who has aborted before. #SoulTies
So the pressure is on the woman who wants to marry to stay "clean" while it's ok for d man to swim around town as he likes. #SoulTies
I have described in tweet 39, amidst of the Nigeria society. Describing it doesn't mean I endorse it. I don't endorse it. #SoulTies
Now Taju & Tanya are married. 6 months later, Taju is out there reaching out to one or two old girlfriends on Facebook. #SoulTies
Facebook is almost a curse when it comes to #SoulTies. Experts advise you refrain from contacting old flames on Facebook. #SoulTies
Researchers reckon almost 62% of those who got in touch with an old flame eventually got in bed with them. #SoulTies
Researchers suggest that if you are not single, widowed or divorced, u should refrain from contacting old flames on FB. #SoulTies
Back to Taju, why does he start contacting old flames on Facebook? He has had 6 months of staying with one woman! #SoulTies
6 months is the longest he has ever stayed copulating with d same woman, which is his wife.Others never lasted half as long.#SoulTies
He gets bored. His #SoulTies are still active underneath, he remembers the assorted times from more experienced girlfriends.#SoulTies
It's not enough for the woman to be right, we also need to ensure that the man is rid of #SoulTies for d marriage to work & survive.
Taju is back with 2 of his old flames secretly to reproduce his past assorted sexual experiences with them. #SoulTies
It matters where d guy has been before you met him else these things will pop to the surface months after you are married. #SoulTies
Sex is the most addictive soul tie in the world today. It's far more addictive than drugs. #SoulTies
A man who has not been purged of the sexual #SoulTies with d Word of God only needs an enabling situation to break his vows. #SoulTies
Let me tell you this real life story to drive home my point. Many years ago in Nigeria, I needed a lift from work. #SoulTies
I worked with KPMG then. I got lumbered with 4 married guys in the car. I knew all of them but we were never close. #SoulTies
knew one of them to be a Christian who attended a monthly revival meeting of a large Nigerian denomination. Others weren't. #SoulTies
1 unwritten code we have as men is that we don't snitch. So these guys had no problem starting this conversation in d car. #SoulTies
One of them had just been married recently and a conversation started when his mates asked when he was coming out to 'town'. #SoulTies
He told them that he was coming out to 'town' soon.Then his mates started marketing their escapades outside marriage to him.#SoulTies
The Christian guy was one of the marketers. This conversation had gone on for like 15mins and I became very curious.#SoulTies
I definitely had to join this conversation as we had at least one more hour of travel.I too had just been married.#SoulTies
So I decided to pop this question when there was a pause in the conversation. #SoulTies read question in next tweet.
Guys, if u are now married to a wife, why don't you do all these crazy stuff with her alone and be free of guilt and STD? #SoulTies
U will find their answers ridiculous but an ignorance of these answers for a naive sister can sink your marriage dreams. #SoulTies
Answer 1-> one of them said "we do rough sex only with outside girls, wives are to treated with respect, not roughly." #SoulTies
Let's break answer down over a few tweets. 1st, there is suggestion of a dual life of decent sex at home & rough sex outside.#SoulTies
None of them disclosed their dual operations to their wives but implicitly assumed dat their wives shouldn't be part of it. #SoulTies
2nd analysis was that girls out there who hang out with married men are only being used as tools of sexual gratification. #SoulTies
If you are a girl doing a married man, this is what he thinks of you. You are only good enough for rough sex. No more. #SoulTies
3rd analysis was that 1 wife was unable to provide these colourful experiences provided by a wide range of women out there. #SoulTies
From that one answer, there was absolutely no way their wives could compete on that turf with the outside girls. #SoulTies
There is something about a man married to a woman that is untouched by no-one else so they'll pretend in church to get u. #SoulTies
Let me go slightly more explicit here. Over the last few years, some new bedroom styles have been floating around. #SoulTies
Honestly, these can be very uncomfortable for those who were never sexually active before marriage. A challenge here. #SoulTies
This provides the wrong inner justification for these men with unbridled appetites to carry on with their atrocities. #SoulTies
Addiction to assorted past sexual experiences is number one reason why men cheat. #SoulTies
A challenge is that these r never disclosed to the unsuspecting sister being pressured by her parents to marry in a hurry. #SoulTies
How do we deal with that answer for intending couples? I'll share my two cents here. #SoulTies
Once courtship starts, I think there should be a discussion of these matters where both man & woman align their desires. #SoulTies
If you only just discovered after you married, then my recommended option for you is prayer & fasting to crush the #SoulTies
Answer 2 from these guys. They said there was a thrill in slipping out to be with these other women that's addictive. #SoulTies
We can decode that with 2 scriptures in proverbs. #SoulTies
Pro 20:17 Bread of deceit is sweet to a man;but afterwards his mouth shall be filled with grave. #SoulTies
Proverbs 9:17 Stolen waters are sweet,and bread eaten in secret is pleasant.#SoulTies
Proverbs 9:18 But he knoweth not that the dead are there;and that her guests are in the depths of hell.#SoulTies
A lady once tweeted that forbidden love was the sweetest. I don't know where to start. #SoulTies
Please note that these guys only used d girls as tools & they had no romantic link or they faked romantic links with them.#SoulTies
Next reason why men cheat is access to or desire to be romantically back with their ex-girlfriends aka old flames. #SoulTies
Please note that both non church men as well as church men with #SoulTies are affected by this. You'll be shocked.
A woman married to a clergyman kept being buffeted by her ex-boyfriend who was having a problem in his marriage. #SoulTies
She had to scream for help through a Christian talk show cos she couldn't carry it to church.Their meeting point was FB. #SoulTies
Single sisters, when a man has problems with his marriage & u give him your shoulder to cry on,won't stop there till oops! #SoulTies
Single sisters, you are not marriage counsellors. If he has problems, let him go see the trained counsellors. #SoulTies
This one is subtle and deceptive cos it never starts as an affair. It starts just as long telephone gists. #SoulTies
Telephone gists can only be done when wife and kids are all gone to bed. Next, your phone travels around in your pocket. #SoulTies
Next, you password your phone and not even your wife and kids can open it cos the phone is very "hot". #SoulTies
Next, the gists can no longer convey the intensity of the bond so physically contact is arranged and oops. #SoulTies
Problems at home open the door for this kind of liaisons.Brash lady used to annoy her husband there were lots of fights. #SoulTies
Next, she complains that her husband uses d loo every night for over an hour talking to some woman outside the marriage. #SoulTies
Issues should be addressed, confronted and resolved in marriage else leaks like these happen that can let enemy in. #SoulTies
No matter how old fashioned u want to remain, u can't ignore the effects of e-flirting, e-romance, e-cheating, e-sex etc #SoulTies
Y'all ain't seen nothing yet. There's even e-wanking. Man & woman link up on Skype. Then they are wanking while chatting. #SoulTies
Pretty much anything u can do in real life, just prefix it with an "e-" and u are good to go. Bible already knew about this. #SoulTies
Anything the mind can visualise & enjoy the thoughts of, it's as though u are physically experiencing the reality of it. #SoulTies
Many Nigerian men seek e-experiences with ex-lovers or new acquaintances for emotional fulfilment #SoulTies
I hope y'all know that u can forge full #SoulTies with another person through an e-experience without having met each other before.
Many Nigerian marriages are at risk of e-cheating because men can do quite a lot now with their smartphones.. #SoulTies
Today's Nigerian man is far more sophisticated than our dads and grandpas. The culture is evolving somehow. #SoulTies
With Nigeria now fully embedded in the online community, men have access to the entire cyberspace to meet new people.. #SoulTies
In the e-world, selection pool is not restricted by geography. You can be in Abuja catching feelings with a lady in Enugu. #SoulTies
A man in Texas could be e-wanking with an ex-lover in Port-Harcourt. #SoulTies
Twitter, FaceBook, BBM, WhatsApp have opened limitless access to a plethora of e-relationship options across the globe. #SoulTies
With a cheap BB device in Nigeria, you can be up and running in an e-relationship or e-fling in less than 24 hours. #SoulTies
It's now so easy for married men in Nigeria to start illicit e-relationships that will culminate into full blown affairs. #SoulTies
Sadly, many of these e-flings would culminate into full blown and real-life experiences, if not nipped in the bud. #SoulTies
We heard lately of a FaceBook e-relationship with a married man in Nigeria that resulted in a fatality. #SoulTies
I have stated the latest trends in those tweets but this shouldn't be construed by conservatives as an endorsement from me. #SoulTies
And before the men think I've hit them too hard, for every e-relationship u have, there is a willing e-SideChick out there. #SoulTies
Another reason men cheat is food! Food! Africans say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. #SoulTies
Haven't you noticed in Nollywood films that mistresses and concubines out there are great cooks. #SoulTies
No one knows Samuel as well as Mama Samuel. U want to marry Samuel? Please make friends with Mama Samuel & ask questions. #SoulTies
Ask Mama Samuel how Samuel loves his food cooked. Be humble to learn how cos that may be your lifeline in 5 years time. #SoulTies
When I was a young boy, I saw women lose their husbands attention to better cooks on the streets. #SoulTies
Now the woman out there is not cooking for charity, she's doing it get the whole of the man to herself. #SoulTies
We heard stories of women adding supplements to food in a bid to turn the hearts of the men they wanted to entice. #SoulTies
If ur husband is a man given to food, u have a challenge cos he could be spotted by better cooks out there for enticement.#SoulTies
We spotted 3 reasons why men cheat tonight.Sex, Emotional ties with past lovers, food. Sex being the most powerful one.#SoulTies
Married men have been known to have gone into their house maids,secretaries etc.There are 2 other reasons I want to add. #SoulTies
Reason 4:I think some men are plain demonic as their actions in this area defy logic.Like raping house maid,step daughters #SoulTies
It's demonic and only spiritual discernment can make you avoid such men. U are better off never to have met such men. #SoulTies.
If you are unfortunately married to one, seek spiritual advice ASAP. #SoulTies
Some may require law enforcement agents being informed as a mandatory obligation. #SoulTies
Reason 5, is if as a married woman you are not in the centre of his passion. U need to pay attention here. #SoulTies
Church people can be badly exposed here and I'll explain. #SoulTies
Quick scenario. Taju owns & runs a fast growing company called Taj Holdings.Tanya doesn't need to work as they r very comfy.#SoulTies
Tanya's passion is now holidays, shoes and jewellery. But Taju's passion is all about growing this company. #SoulTies
Ladies, a man's main passion is most of the time not you but his work. He pours himself into his work to provide for you. #SoulTies
He sees clearly that Tanya's passion is to spend the money. Taju has no problem with that cos there's excess money. #SoulTies
Problem is that Taju has a female PA who knows 100% about Taj Holdings while Tanya only knows about the chequebook. #SoulTies
Taju works 16hrs daily with the PA while Tanya is busy driving around with her prodigal friends in the family RangeRover. #SoulTies
Though Taju is a decent guy married to Tanya, Tanya is not located in the centre of Taju's passion->growing Taj Holdings. #SoulTies
PA called Genevieve works very hard for 16 hours daily away from her family. One day Genevieve comes crying to work. #SoulTies
She says that school fees for kids are short. Taju makes up the difference cos he doesn't want her distracted from work. #SoulTies
Next, she says her husband is uncaring, Taju comforts her. Gradually a bond is growing as they watch each other's back. #SoulTies
Genevieve works harder to repay Taju's loyalty while Tanya is home booking holidays. Over a period of 2 years,#SoulTies are formed
A pact of secrecy is developed and Genevieve becomes the most powerful person in that organisation. #SoulTies
This opens the door for deeper intimacy which never started as such. Many CEO's are known to have had affairs with PAs. #SoulTies
Affairs happen between bosses and PA's cos they spend far too much time together running the company. #SoulTies
Ladies, if any woman spends more time than you in the centre of your husband's passion you are at risk of losing him. #SoulTies
Close, Prolonged, intensive and continual contact with female PA can birth #SoulTies capable of drawing both into sex. #SoulTies
Reason 6, Men also cheat when there is a problem with their wives having children. This happens a lot more in Africa. #SoulTies
In Africa, men are under pressure from their families to produce kids in their marriage after a certain time. #SoulTies
If kids don't show up in an African marriage after 2 years, family members begin to hit the panic button. #SoulTies
I have seen many families in Nigeria where such men resorted to making babies with external Delilah's. #SoulTies
There are cases of women who turned up with kids at mens funerals in Africa saying they had the kids for them. #SoulTies
If the men in question are not born again Christians whose hearts are circumcised by the Word, they are fallible to this. #SoulTies
I have seen some families split up in Nigeria because the wife had no male child in 4 and the man started trying outside. #SoulTies
Technically, that is cheating. Every man should stand with his wife and believe God supernaturally for a child. #SoulTies
If having kids is no longer possible, then couples want to explore possibilities of adoption. Your choice though. #SoulTies
So we got 6 reasons today amongst others why married men cheat. #SoulTies
Please note that these are not being postulated as valid excuses for men to cheat. The standards of God are very clear. #SoulTies
God hates fornication and adultery. The blame for adultery or fornication is shared 50-50 between both participants. #SoulTies
We dug these out so our sisters can be street wise and be spiritually discerning as they choose who to marry & how to live. #SoulTies
Been a long session. Please read & retweet to all your followers. Please leave comments & questions on http://www.BreakingSoulTies.com #SoulTies
Remain blessed. See you again soon. #SoulTies Jesus is Lord!!