Sometimes it's hard to get the measure of people. You think they're one thing - maybe honest, kind, or helpful - but actually you later find out that they're exactly the opposite.
As a child, I had an innate ability to instantly determine the measure of a person. I could tell within a very short space of time the trustworthiness of a person, and whether they were good or bad. I found it easy to very quickly ascertain what a new person introduced to me was like fundamentally. How? I've no idea, but I was rarely wrong.
As time has ticked on, this ability seems to have lessened to some degree. Perhaps my head is filled with too much knowledge now. My desire is to find the best in every person, but we know we need to be aware of scammers, fraudsters and general crack-pots. My personal experiences tell me to be wary of people who easily let you down and hurt you. Using my heart and my head, who are often warring in opposition, distorts the basic intuition that once existed.
But getting the measure of a man (or woman) is important, because there are many fraudsters out there. There are many people who just want to take advantage of others, by either extorting money, or abusing someone's good nature; they use people for whatever they can get out of them: time, money, emotional support, acceptance, personal progression....the list goes on.
Matthew 7 v 15 warns us to:
"Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits".
Why is this apt today?
This is vital for today's society - hardly a day goes by without a newspaper report of a seemingly "helpful" tradesperson ripping someone off. Fraud is a growing industry; kind-hearted or vulnerable people are being taken advantage of by parasitic scroungers. And just as importantly, false teachers are leading the body of Christ astray.
Healthy plants produce a good crop or good fruits. The bible advises us that we should look for this good fruit in people's lives to help us determine what sort of person they are. Some are easy to spot, yet some are dressed up in sheep's clothing, seemingly looking like an innocent sheep. Yet actually, they're a ravenous wolf waiting to attack their prey.
What can we take from this in practical terms?
In biblical terms, or spiritually, we need to be alert.
- Is the person bearing fruit? Is this fruit in line with the fruit of the Spirit?
- Is the person a bible believer? Do they take all the bible and teach it, live it and breathe it? Or do they take some bits to fit themselves and their lifestyle, disregarding the rest?
- Do they 'walk the walk', as well as 'talk the talk'?
- Are they teachable, accountable and humble?
- Are they growing to be more Christ-like?
In practical terms in our general lives, we can use this verse to help us:
- What is the person's life like? Does what they say about themselves line up with what they actually live out? i.e. do they walk out what they talk out?
- Does their speech confuse or beguile? i.e . do they contradict themselves or deliberately confuse, or use vague language?
- Are they truthful in the small things? If the small things don't add up, the big things won't either.
- Do they flatter you unnecessarily? Beware of flattery. the bible has many many verses warning about it. Let's just take one from Psalm 12 "With flattering lips and with a double heart they speak" Flattery catches you off guard, gives you a positive emotional response, which will lead to positive feelings about the flatterer. Beware of someone constantly flattering you! Flattery is empty admiration.
- Do they conceal their own life, and adopt a "do as I say, not what I do" mentality? I.e are they hypocrites, doing one thing, saying another?
- Do they sound too good to be true? Often things that are too good to be true are just that. Not always, but mostly. We usually look for the "catch" (what's the catch?), so if there isn't one, that's generally the catch!
The bible is full of practical wisdom that applies to both our spiritual well-being and our everyday lives. These days are full of dangers, there's no denying it, and the bible warns us to be awake, alert and to be wise. We need to take heed of who and what we are letting into our lives and most importantly our hearts. It's the heart damage that God is really concerned with.
Proverbs 4 v 23 tells us to
Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard, for out of it flow the springs of life.