"We are sold the idea that happiness is in a product, in a journey and we are made to chase after that something outside" Ilios Kotsou
I believe that introspection, self-observation, the recognition of emotions and thoughts and taking responsibility for one's life are fundamental notions for self-knowledge. The "forcing" of things, success at all costs, the quest for perfection, the ultimate being, the putting on of oneself, I am less sure.
Personal development as a necessary phase for the restructuring of the ego
To counterbalance low self-esteem, it may be necessary to restructure the ego to cleanse it, using often relevant keys to personal development. A phase of self-healing, often long, in which one accumulates other knowledge to fill oneself with something other than the painful elements that used to fill us up until now (much too limiting beliefs, victimization). Then we're full. And then it is necessary to empty again, on a healthier, more pleasant, more peaceful ground.
Then peace is made and all these tools and personal development and this race after the fulfillment of the individual no longer makes sense. Our posture has changed. It is the interior, not the exterior. We don't have to think about making the right choices anymore, we just do them. We realize that everything we have been able to learn so far in the many Youtube books and videos has grown on a fairly neurotic ground. Until all of this subsided. And that contentment and "confidence" in what is is our profound posture.
Because don't screw around, but if you've read three personal development books, you've read them all.