Lessons of the silence...
Inspiration for this post comes from an ego-death induced by large amounts of injested ganja and Alan Watts lectures..
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How To Accept The Part Of Us That Does Not Accept?
Wow, This ego-death sounds like a powerful experience! Was it exhilarating or horrifying?
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I think when you are not ready to see the illusion of your character then it is very horrifying and you will fight not to let go of your self, but I was finally ready this time and it felt like horrifying and liberating at the same time :D
The first thing that I realized when I saw my story was fake, was that there is nothing in my story that is going to fill up the emptiness and that I am alone and always will be!
This was the most sad and lonely feeling I ever felt, but by excepting this truth it felt kinda liberating too. Now I can see that I have too balance it out. I need some silence/emptiness in a day and except it. Filling it up all the time just makes bigger crashes after the filling.
And the ego is always trying to be somebody, to create separation, to hide the emptiness.. and this is also a part of me that I have to except.
Now there is a big paradox inside all of this.. how to over come your program/ego when you can't try to over come it? Once you try to be a better man you're creating a new illusion of the self.. haha.. it is kinda funny how life works..
Anyway I see it as a very positive experience and feel a little more peaceful then before, but life is still the same except now I am trying to be with the uncomfortable situations too instead of trying to escape them.
How to learn the skill of being instead of doing/trying all the time?
This is the mindfuck of life lol.. :D
If you are interested this kind of experiences, listening to certain Alan Watts lectures while tripping can help provoce an internal dialog that is necessary to see the illusion.
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Got to try this. Even though I know I will be scared shitless!
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Everybody is scared to see what is really inside, it is part of what makes us human. Once you have seen then the fear will subside..
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I want to experience this... Can you recommend one or two lectures by Alan Watts that a newbie like myself can get started with? And any preperations that I should do before. Do I need someone to monitor the situation to keep me safe? Thank you for any advise that you can give. After reading your post I was thinking... I need to do this!
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I would say first - to start slowly, to check if you feel ready for this, and to get used to this high feeling from edible cannabis.
While you do this start to listen to Alan Watts, somehow this was very helpful for my anxiety. That was actually the reason why I started to listen :).
P.S. uncondition yourself completely from government cannabis beliefs.. lol.. research some amazing articles about cannabis on www.goodgopher.com (don't use biased google) for independent, unbiased research articles about precious ganja and its mental and fysical healing power!
I will look for which lectures exactly I was listening, message coming soon..:)
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Thanks! edible cannabis is very strong. I would need to just take a small dose. Thanks for goodgopher info! I never heard of that before. I have been using www.duckduckgo.com
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Ah yes I tried it before -duckduckgo but I prefer good gopher actually, maybe it is just out of habbit :)
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Links to Alan Watts lectures
Another interesting video/docu about the illusion of the self "The Cosmic Giggle"
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Thanks you! I will start with these videos... I'll let you know the progress.
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Yes thanks :)
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I think it is better to be completely alone by the way but you can ask your best friend or wife to be in the next room if you need him or her.
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Thanks. With cannabis you are right. Just be alone. I initially was thinking you meant LSD.
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Then I also would prefer a sitter maybe :)
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I love where your inspiration for your ego death comes from. Sadly my ego is so flipping strong!!
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Lol :D that is the game my friend, the ego death only made me more aware of my ego based actions.. it is still there very strong but I know it is only a part of the emptiness and I have to accept it as it is...
and stop forcing the process.
But coming from 31 years of doing it is very difficult to learn non-doing!
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This post has received a 4.51 % upvote from @booster thanks to: @mitchiesfoodrace.
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