Skari, an old life traveling companion, is now on the journey that lies ahead of us all. And a short while ago another on, Gestur Guðna, also moved to the other side. We've been traveling companions on and off for 40 years, and many things have happened during that time.
Memories of all the ups and downs of those colorful years flowed through my mind because they both were, in their different way, very colorful characters.
To my mind came a text fragment from the song of the Swedish band, Bo Kaspers Orchestra, "Innan allt försvinner," (e. Before everything disappears)
...
Jag ångrar ingenting
Men tiden kommer
När man ska betala
Innan allt försvinner, försvinner
Innan allt försvinner, försvinner
Innan allt försvinner, försvinner
Innan jag hamnar i det stora svarta hålet
...
(in simple English translation)
I don't regret anything
But the time is coming
When we have to pay
Before everything disappears, disappears
Before everything disappears, disappears
Before everything disappears, disappears
Before I end up in a big black hole
...
This morning, like most days, just a typical day like any other, with its daily round, life goes on though gradually one by one of my generation we wake up one morning in a new place.
Not knowing how to say goodbye except in my own way, I got up, went into the living room, pushed all the furniture into a corner, found "Innan allt försvinner,," sat the computer on a chair, put on record and said goodbye to my companions in the only way I know how to.
"Well boys, it's not how or when we wake up in a new place, but what we do until then, and I'm thinking of trying to do what I enjoy and that nourishes me the most and sends it with you as a provision on this journey of yours, and hopefully, it will benefit you where ever you are going. But you have to forgive me for thinking also about my self, as well as the rest of us that you leave behind; that we should remember to live the richest life "Innan allt försvinner,."
Tuned-up Bo Kaspers Orchestra, "OK boys, you were never great dancers, but I still succeeded to dance with you both along the way, although a long time ago, then this song came to my mind and now no whining, now we dance, LA GO! And good luck to you on your journey to your new home innan allt försvinner!
Braaaagi!
Sorry to hear about your friends, but also very glad to see you back here.
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Thanks, Ewa. Well, death, and near death, has been following me around for some time. And I don't want to go to more funerals. At least not now. But I'm a dancer, and for me to dance is like breathing for others, I just have to dance. And I can always say goodbye in my own way. Probably think most of them would rather prefer it anyway, at least it's one on one and personal. And yes, it's good to be back. I have no idea how long or anything. Live is the same roller coaster now as it has been for last, what, 2, 3 years? I've lost count. But I still don't give up, so this is one of the things I decided to do, start recording my dance. First I posted one on Facebook, it was a challenge, afraid that people would think that it was some kind of an egotrip, but it wasn't, and isn't, I just have to find ways to let off steam and find reasons to move on. Photos and editing, no, I lost the touch, it was a panic, I just lost it! But I'll get it back, no problem, it's just like everything else in my life, especially lately, it all comes and goes. So if no photos, I decided to start my own YouTube channel, was just opening it right now and this is my first post. I'm also starting to play my music again and fiddling around recording and mixing my songs on the computer, something I've never done before, that is testing my songs like a one-man band on the computer. Maybe I will be posting songs here instead of photos after a while;) Dance videos and songs? Who knows, not I. The only thing I know is that art in any form, does not meter how, just to create something is what I have to do, and now more than ever.
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Bragi!!!
I cannot believe it was you who showed up at my door!!! So glad to see you and I am so sorry to hear about your friends, Skari and Gestur.I think they would be touched at such a gesture and yes, I liked it because it had feeling in it. Just the way you probably were, wild and free and probably not all that long ago. ;)
I have to say that the day my father died, I was devastated that the world did not turn on its axis, the sun was shining, the birds were singing and people were piling up on the highways, trying to get to work on time. "Stop!" my heart cried. "My father has died" and yet... life went on. It was a tad devastating to know that all those feelings were only within the confines of my life and people and didn't affect the whole world, but, it felt like it should.
Indeed, I enjoyed the dance. It expresses you and them and is something I can enjoy right along with you. I wish you peace in your soul.
And now... Let's dance.
!tip
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In many places in Africa, people sing and dance at funerals when someone dies. Outsiders are often stunned by it and ask, "way do you do that? Is singing and dancing, not a celebration? Are you celebrating that someone dies?" Often whit a sympathetic smile I'm told, the outsider is informed. " It's not for the one that has died, it's for the others, us, that are left behind. The one that has past away doesn't need anything, he, or she is already gone on the journey that we all will go on when we leave this place. And it's not a sad journey, but one full of open doors to new wonders. But we, we are the one that need the comfort in our sorrow. So we do what all knowes are the most nutritious thing on earth, we sing and dance to heal the wounds of missing someone."
Ther are many reasons way I dance, but they are all about feelings, be I sad, I dance it away, be I happy, I celebrate and let the sun in, be I empty and lost, I fill the tanks. Dansing can do all that, and much more.
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🎁 Hi @bragih! You have received 0.1 STEEM tip from @dswigle!
@dswigle wrote lately about: Life And Living Feel free to follow @dswigle if you like it :)
Sending tips with @tipU - how to guide.
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Bragi............! Good to see you back!! :)
I liked what and how you wrote it... I liked that you danced instead of mourned... So sorry for you losing your friends. I too lost someone close nearly a year ago, my sister; one is never the same again, but you find ways to carry on, day by day. To celebrate Life as you say, and to celebrate the life of that person... Glad you are back!
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Hi, ackhoo, wonderful to see you and be back. Yes, it's nice to be back and finding you all here. I have missed you, but things have been that way that I haven't had the time or the mental energy to visit you.
It's heartwarming for me to get such a warm welcome from you; it feels like being back "home" and meet up whit the "family." Yes, we were, and are, such a strange family, the tights that were formed on Tsu, onward through all the other SF we trie; we wanted to be together, and I want that too. I hope that things will not turn back to the hell I've been through again, or at least, I get a brack from it, and then I will both have the time and inspiration to participate in Steemit, and other things on the veb I'm trying. Like making a YouTube channel ;) Never in a lifetime, would I have gest that I would do something like that. But, there it is, and now I'm going to tell my "dance storry "there. It's the story of my life, travel through heaven and hell, but describe it through dancing, is a way that I think fits my storytelling. And hopefully also music, I'm planning to put my music there, hopefully soon.
To see someone as close as a sister starts on this jurny is much more then what I went true seeing my friends start this walk. It is said that it takes about two years to get one together again after a loss. Be it a breakup of lovers or death of someone close to one. But what one does those 2 years are crucial; cos if we don't go through all the 5, some say 7, stages of grieving, then maybe we will never get over it. I know people that never went trou the grieving process and are still stuck in a terrible place in life, many, many years later. One part of the grieving proses is to accept and embrace the sorrow, but we don't have to do it just by crying, well, we have to do that too, get it out, but to find a way to embrace that feeling in some other way to so we can change it into something else and sett it free to fly away into the sun, or sunset, whatever is more beautiful and enlighting. In your case, I guess that your sunset window would be the appropriate way to fly away when it's ready to be lett loos, I think. I still envy you of your "sunset window," you have shown us so many times what a gem it is. So if for me it's trou dancing, maybe yours are the sunset window, who knows.
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It does feel like 'family' doesn't it... :) I'm not one of those overly missing tsu, but that's something tsu made us feel, like we were family, maybe because we were all together on that first journey on such a platform, and we all felt strongly about it. Nowadays there are so many, definitely no more the family feel...
In view of the rough times, I hope things take a positive turn from hereon and work out to be better and better, for you... for us both! :) I am (I hope) moving out of the grieving period... sometimes it is still sad... and hard, hard to believe still. That is the acceptance as you say - not fully 100% yet.
'Sunset window' ~ I like that! My sunset window and for you, your dancing...
Have a good weekend, my friend!
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