Do you know how to avoid resentment and revenge?

in education •  7 years ago  (edited)

Criticism corrodes human relationships.

When someone is criticized in a socially unskilled way, the floodgates of resentment and finally of revenge are opened.

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But how can you do that, that person is acting incorrectly, and you want him to rectify that he is acting unfairly?

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Simple with an assertive observation of your actions.

How can a constructive criticism or an assertive observation be applied socially?

At the time of constructive criticism or assertive observation, I recommend that you initially point out your positive actions, that is, what you do correctly, then address your negative actions, that is, what does not work correctly, and At that time he suggests a formula on how he could improve it.

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The idea is that this person knows that he does many activities in a positive way, and that he only has those details to improve, remember first the positive and then what could be improved.

Avoid sarcasm and / or contempt:

The other person's natural reaction is to take a defensive position, and immediately it will be blocked to any behavior change that is intended to be made.

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The idea is to generate a positive change in the individual, but if sarcasm is used or even worse contempt, you will see how is placed in combat position.

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Dosage:

Try to make constructive criticism or assertive observation when it really corresponds

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Do not become a critic of profession,

It is not critical, critical and critical, what is sought is to generate positive changes in the organization, but if it is always in "Criticón" mode, then the effect is lost, its essence is lost.

Always in private, never in public:

They are truly efficient face to face and in private.

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A criticism in public, however well-intentioned it may be can be understood as a humiliation or a questioning of the merit of the critical person.


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Be empathetic:

Understand the real impact that criticism produces and the way you express it, seek empathy with the other individual, that he or she knows you understand their situation, that you are not discouraged or unfriendly , know that you do it for their welfare.

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People with little empathy often convey criticism that is too sharp and harsh, that they do not have the capacity to perceive the other's feelings or to put themselves in their place.

Do not impose yourself:

Do not try to impose your point of view, do not forget that it is your opinion, and you have the right to express it assertively, but the other person also has the right to follow your advice or not, so ensure that the person does not feel that he is oppressing her, on the contrary, it is for his welfare.


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That is why I invite you to practice these strategies and I assure you that you will succeed and that your train will never derail.

What are you waiting for!

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@ manuel97

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Nice post

thank you very kind

You've made some very good points. I'd like to add that three words often missing in today's relationships are:

You are right

Without positive acknowledgment of some of the other person's opinions, we stand the risk of completely losing the argument, and maybe a good friend.

true what you tell me, you are right: many times we can not accept that another person may be right, in the first place, because they taught us from childhood to win, and yes we accept that another person is right, that is, we are wrong , but you have to leave all that behind and have the courage to accept the mistakes, and say: You're right.

Your observation is very valid, greetings.

Buen post, pasate.

Gracias, ya paso por el tuyo, saludos

Muy buena tu redacción. Excelente

Gracias @canaima1957 me alegro que te guste, saludos