“Change your thoughts and you change your world.” ~Norman Peale
I used to watch people on the streets and think their boisterous conversations and broad smiles were evidence they lived a life better than mine.
I assumed they were happier than me, smarter, and worth more than me.
I would sit in my house and try to imagine what it would be like to be someone else, someone happier.
Have you ever felt like everyone else was doing better than you? Like the deck was so stacked against you and you'd never catch up? I understand the feeling.
I was always a dreamer with big ideas and ridiculous plans, but I was unable to make those plans a reality because the story I told myself was that I wasn't enough. As long as I continued to tell myself that story, I would continue to be not enough.
The current state of your life is a direct result of the stories you tell yourself, and what you really believe is possible not what you say is possible, but what you believe deep down in your core.
My story about not being good enough showed itself in every aspect of my life, my family, my social life and my achievements.
Until I was able to open my eyes and change it, these aspects of my life were not changing. You receive what you are telling your subconscious mind you deserve. I was telling that I wasn't good enough and that's what I saw all around me.
I realized this one day when I was watching one of Tony Robbins video on YouTube. Yes, I had heard it plenty of times before, but for some reason at that time, it really clicked. You will learn the lessons you most need when you are ready for them.
The first step in changing a limiting belief is identifying it.
Identifying my story about not being good enough was surprisingly difficult because I had told myself that story for so long I thought of it as true.
What limiting story are you telling yourself? Maybe it's that you'll never find love or that you'll never earn over a certain amount of money or you'll never make a living doing what you love or that you are not smart enough to succeed.
All of these are stories. The difference between you and the others is the stories you tell yourself. Changing that story is one of the most important steps to changing your life.
Now that you've identified your story, you have to make a new one instead.
For me, it was simply deciding that I was just as good as anyone else and I deserved just as much as anyone else. Think about your limiting story. How can you change that story to make it empowering?
A new story in itself is not always enough, it needs to be rooted in something. You have to believe it, and changing your belief can be the most difficult thing.
When I looked at my life objectively, I realized that I'd actually accomplished quite a bit. I'd always done well in school. I'd written quite a large body of work I enjoyed and I always stand to be helpful to others. I was a loving and caring person.
As I started to look at my situation more, I realized that one of my core problems was “the anyone else” part of my story? I was comparing myself to others and that lead to unhappiness. I started to change my story again to simply say that I am good.
Supporting your new story with facts will help you believe it, but what really anchors it into your life is associating it with positive emotions.
I started meditating every morning and night. Once my meditation was over, before I got up, I'd visualize something that was connected to my new story.
I'd imagine myself having relaxed life with the conversations with right people, and being here in a safehouse. You can imagine anything you like.
Be kind to yourself
The physical circumstances around you won't change overnight. You won't change to being abundant and then suddenly have millions in your bank account the next morning. What will happen, though, is you will recognize the opportunities that will get you there. Don't be angry with yourself or the Universe if it is not fast enough for you. Taking small steps in the right direction every day will get you there.