That's right, sometimes we find ourselves disguising our true feelings with the expressions we use. Let's see some examples:
-She says: Remember you have a family!
The message between the lines is: We miss you at home, it is not the same without you, this time we did not enjoy the activity so much because you were not there.
-He says: It was about time you arrived ... Where were you?
The message between the lines is: I am not in the house without you, I feel alone if you are not, you arrive and everything is illuminated for me.
I speak of a skill that allows us to grasp the true message that our spouse is feeling. Only that his emotional state of anxiety, worry, impotence, insecurity or anger governs him at that moment; this happens to all of us. The detail is that we almost always ignore the message between the lines, I affirm this because when dealing with some people who have difficulties with their partner, he asked them: Why do you think he answered you in that way? Why did he react like that? and most of the answers obtained verify that they perceive the reality of the loved one. However, only the oral message directed by the emotions of the moment is heard and kept in the heart, that is, bad decisions are made that contribute little to the well-being of the relationship.
It is necessary that we stop seeing the mistakes that our partner makes and begin to detail our own weaknesses. While it is true that the couple is wrong, it is also true that what we criticize reflects that we are doing the same. Reflect on the following, What would happen if, in the face of the questioning or reproaches that are made to us, we undressed the feeling of the spouse from love, tenderness or good humor?
That is, if she refers: "Sure, because anyone is more important to you before me"
and he responds from love and good humor: "My love you are feeling that I do not give you priority, my beautiful you are angry because I did not spend more time with you today ... Come here and I consent and I stay to please my queen " What would happen? Says a proverb. "The soft response removes the anger, but the harsh word raises the fury" and believe me God is not wrong.
It is time to strengthen communication skills, to acquire wisdom (God looks is the heart when we speak to him). Encourage yourself and give more importance to the message between the lines.