Teenage Mom and Baby 'Easy' Targets for MCFD: Pamela's Story -- Part II (FamilyProtection Series)

The government workers suddenly took the teenage mother's baby, two days before Christmas, 2014.

There had been no warning and no investigation.

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Read the first part of Pamela's story HERE ➽ ➽ ... No investigation Before Taking Teenage Mom's Baby: Pamela's Story -- Part I (FamilyProtection Series)

{ This is a true story that I (@canadian-coconut) was involved in. It showed me first-hand how corrupt the child protective system in BC, Canada can be, known here as MCFD or Ministry of Children and Family Development. }

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The baby's father, Joe, was staying with my family while we tried to figure out what was happening and how to get the baby back.

Pamela needed to talk to someone at MCFD to find out who was assigned as her Social Worker, let them know that her mother had kicked her out of her home and that she no longer could see her infant son.

The big question was ... WHY?

Why had Social Workers and Police suddenly showed up without any investigation or questions about her parenting abilities, and stripped all of her parental rights?

A Social Worker had taken Pamela's cell phone away from her at the initial contact on December 23rd, and they had never returned it. So I let Pamela make all of the phone calls from my house.

Offices were closed for Christmas and Boxing Day, and then for the weekend, so no help could be found. We knew that she would need a lawyer right aways, but the Legal Aid office was closed until after New Years Day, so she could not start an application.

Finally, on Monday, December 29th she was able to speak to her Social Worker on the phone. They had assigned the girl a Social Worker in a town half an hour away! Meanwhile there was an office in our town and she was a teenager who had just been kicked out of her vindictive mother's home. There was not even a bus route to go there. I told Pamela that I would get her there somehow.

The young mother who was grieving her absent baby, insisted on an appointment right aways at the office to talk to the Social Worker. The Social Worker kept saying that it was not necessary, and that they would arrange a visit in a week or so at her mother's house. But Pamela kept calling back and insisting that she needed to see her NOW!

At last the Social Worker relented and booked an appointment for her the next day, Tuesday, December 30th. An elderly woman who was a friend of Joe's family drove him and Pamela to the appointment.

I had been warned by a good friend of mine who had gone through hell with MCFD in the past, that Pamela and Joe MUST MUST MUST be at the very next Family Court date. She said that MCFD often will not inform parents of the Court Date. Family Court was always on Wednesdays, and the next one would be on December 31st. So we had already planned on heeding that advice and going just in case, even if they never gave notification.

Joe secretly recorded the meeting with the Social Worker, which I listened to afterwards. She did not explain why everything was happening. After a little while she came out and told them that tomorrow was a court date! She said that they were still working on the paperwork but that they would get a copy of it at the courthouse! AHA!

My friend had indeed given us accurate information! If Pamela had not strongly insisted on this visit, she would NEVER have been informed that she was supposed to appear in court on Wednesday, December 31st. This was to be her "First Appearance" where the Judge decides whether to grant the Order for MCFD to remove the child. They had removed the child BEFORE ever going to a Judge, and expect a Judge to enforce their decision. If Pamela had not been present, the Judge would have had to assume that she didn't care about her child, so he would have naturally grant the MCFD application.

Pamela STILL had not been given any reason for her baby's removal! The only thing mentioned was that the baby needed to be 'medicalled.' But the Doctor had confirmed in front of the Social Workers and parents that he saw no concerns about the baby's health. So what were their accusations? Pamela had NO IDEA! How can you defend yourself when you have no idea of what you have been accused?

My mind was spinning! It was hard to believe the behaviour that I was seeing was possible? What made these government workers think that they could ignore all laws and protocols when it comes to taking someone's child away from them?

Pamela had no lawyer. The Legal Aid office was not even open again until January 5th. We had the name of a good lawyer to ask if he would take her case, but of course he was on holidays.

I took Pamela and Joe to court that day. As we were walking in the door of the courtroom, the Social Worker handed her the legal paper with the accusations. They were only very minor issues listed. Pamela told me that they were not true. But even if they were true, I was stunned that they could be considered reason to remove a baby; especially when the mother had not first been made aware of the concerns or offered a chance to make improvements. The accusations were of a messy bedroom, and diapers not being changed often enough, and letting baby chew on pieces of food like Pizza.

The Judge adjourned the hearing so that Pamela could get a lawyer.

On the one hand this was good as she needed legal representation ... but on the other hand this was a 5-month old nursing baby that we were talking about! He was being force weaned and not allowed to be with his mother! The Judge did order visitation, but the first visit couldn't be arranged for another 5 days until a Visit Supervisor was available!

How are these types of delays acceptable?

We are talking about fragile babies and children being ripped away from their parents! The bond that was being forcibly broken between mother and baby was very damaging. It was atrocious!

The court date kept getting adjourned. Pamela finally had a good lawyer onboard, but he was already booked on the date. Then the Judge ordered that Joe had to find a separte lawyer of his own too, and that took time. Then his lawyer was not available on one of the dates, etc.

We helped the lawyers do their job by composing Affadavits of our own, with all the applicable facts. It took lots of time to compile everything along with all the proof, and gathering reference letters from people. We even had an ice storm put out our electricity right before a court date, and that almost delayed me being able to get things ready. We were up late some nights brainstorming our ideas and trying to put plans into motion.

Joe's parents came up with a plan. They knew a retired couple who were really well respected in the community where they lived and who were willing to help. That couple and Joe's parents, came down and met with Social Workers here and proposed that Pamela and Baby be both allowed to stay together in their home. The well-respected couple (former School Principal and Teacher) requested the Social Workers in their town to do a home study, and their home was approved as meeting MCFD standards. When Pamela went back to court, the request was made to the Judge to drop the whole thing and just give Pamela back her baby, BUT if he would not do that then place the mother and child together in this home.

The decision was FINALLY made on April 14, 2015 to have the mother and baby live together with this retired couple. Unfortunately, the Judge allowed Social Services to stay involved and check in on the situation, BUT the Judge did NOT grant the original request that MCFD made to seize custody of the child.

The lawyer was pleasantly surprised, because in his experience things did not usually go this well.

I remember to this day the look of surprise on the Social Workers face when the Judge did not grant her request. She was in shock that MCFD had lost!

The Social Worker almost always got what she wanted. She thought that this was an easy target, a helpless teenager with no support system; but she didn't count on a community coming together to help.

So Mother and Baby were finally reunited on April 14th, 2015.

Pamela left my house that day and moved 3 hours away to her new home with her baby.

This case is considered a WIN! This is better than most parents get when they go up against the corrupt system.

Yet, how can it be a true win after it took almost 4 months for the Judge to finally decide that MCFD should not have taken the baby in the first place?

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Addendum:

I lost track of a lot of what happened after Pamela moved out of my home. She decided that she didn't want to live in that couple's home anymore, and that she did not want to stay in a relationship with Joe. She moved out, and MCFD saw it as an opportunity to pounce again. Joe's family was no longer there to help her and I was not involved. This time Pamela lost custody of her baby. The baby was placed in Foster Care and then placed back with the grandmother again. As of April 2018, Pamela still does not have custody of her own child.

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(Names have been changed to protect those involved.)

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