Night Post To Clear Thoughts Before Bed. The Summer Relations And Revelations

Whew! Yea!! Not tripping too bad. Almost don't know what to say 'cause it's been allot. Been thinking, um, the 3 women I met by chance in the last while that I learned something from... Also realized they are damaged women, also they are really great people!! They may seem zoomered at times like they are missing, at the same time they are not too far gone like the ones who were abusive or mean to them. I won't go into the gory details of their stories here. I may go more into this later at the same time. My ex girlfriend well, some of her ex dudes seem to have gone down the socio path as well. Giving me more insight into these kinda women's plight. I'm not too much traumatized yet I know more about how brutal their situation is, puts me in a position to be a decent friend where I can. To be able to listen. When people can tell their story they don't feel as alone. I have been thinking of my mom too with her hearing voices and feeling afraid and paranoid when I was a kid, it's the same kind of abandoned/damaged women behaviour it felt. She was afraid of men and male paternal authority figures in society. And with this ex girlfriend, she has kids so my parental instincts kick in.

This morning I heard a Native lady tell her story about the 60's scoop in Canada on the radio, how when she was taken at 5 days old she felt and remembered that, that separation anxiety was felt deep into her years of life. There's more info on that sort of history, this was a good reminder. Somethings extremely wrong with this culture that only takes and doesn't give back. Yea I was kidnapped from the government away from my mom around 11, that's what it felt like. Because agents that came into the house deemed her mentally unstable. It's like I don't have anxiety exactly, all this time. It was more an expression of grief.

So yea kinda tired right now. Would like to say more. I'm sure I will tell more stories soon. At least I'm aware of this and feeling more stable to handle it. Yea the next story I could tell is the long time friend I live with is dealing with someone on their job who had years of being treated poorly by their partner. Talking to her about that has been keeping me on this awareness lately too. Glad I could say something to acknowledge.