NOTICE

of
Intent to Vacate
..............................................................................................................................................................................

Dear Mrs Knicker Face,

Thank you for providing me with a very sweaty and grubby bungalow over the last few months. I have really enjoyed dealing with the yummy neighbours, particularly the one who likes drinking in the middle of the night.

I also love clearing up after the a broken maggots that seems to roam the neighbourhood. I once caught two maggots collapsing in the cellar.

Incidentally, the cellar is like a really stunning pub toilet and the kitchen has moss growing on the walls.

Perhaps, given that you deem 716 Sunset Drive an acceptable place to live, you would like to inhabit it for a while. When it gales, frogs fall through the roof. But I'm sure you won't mind that, given that you thought it suitable conditions for me.

The area is relatively crime free, during my time here, I have only known of two violent assaults and three burglaries, making my bungalow a steal at the current rent.

It is with a most entertaining heart that I hereby give notice on 716 Sunset Drive.

I've left a pair of a broken maggots poking in the bath to express my gratitude.

Yours sincerely
Barker Richblood