Mini writing workshop: What is the best way to write dialog?

in fiction •  6 years ago 

Thank you for checking out the mini fiction writing workshop. In this series I share small, actionable tips for writing fiction. Whether you're a seasoned or developing writer, hopefully you will find some useful information.

This particular workshop is about one of the most challenging aspects of fiction writing: creating great dialog.

Okay, on to the topic of the day!

Coffee shop meeting

Source: Image by Raw Pixel, Pixabay

What is the best way to write dialog?


I'm going to summarize my thought about this with one word: seamlessly.

What does that mean? It means this:

Hide the mechanics of dialog to allow your readers to immerse in your story as quickly and as deeply as possible.

You want readers thinking about the character and the story line and what is going to happen next, not tripping over phrases and treatments of the dialog that distract from the story.

For example, let's do a test. Read the following two examples, and then decide for yourself which one draws you in more. Which one makes you feel like you are part of the story, and like it is revealing itself to you bit by bit, and reeling you in like a fish?

Example 1

"Natalie," Joey said. "Get in the car right now.

"No," Natalie shouted bravely. "You don't own me."

"We'll see about that," Joey cried. He gave a hearty yet evil laugh and grabbed her by the wrist.

"Stop it," Natalie shrieked. She slapped at him and tried to pull away, then she said, "I'm never going anywhere with you again!"

Example 2

Natalie paced just out of Joey's reach. She looked down the highway and then back at him. "I'm not coming with you."

Joey stood next to the car. Every now and then he tried to grab her as she passed by. "Get in the car right now, Natalie."

She stepped back. "I won't! You don't own me."

"We'll see about that!" In one sweep, he had her by the wrist.

She tried to pull away, and felt his grip tighten. "Stop it! I'm never going anywhere with you again!"

Discussion

Do you see the difference? In the first example, everything that is spoken includes the intrusion of the author. The author tells us "Joey said." The author tells us that Natalie shouted. Even worse, the author tells us that she shouted bravely. We readers are being spoken to by an entity other than the characters — the author. And the author does not belong in the story, any more than an artist belongs in a painting of the sea.

How do you do it?

The key is to put the reader in the location. Show the reader through action and body language who is speaking.

Here's an example. Let's say we want Diana to speak, then we want Barbara to reply. Let's describe what Diana is doing, and then deliver her dialog. Then we'll do the same with Barbara. By doing so, we never have to intrude upon the scene and use dialog tags like "Diana said," and "Barbara said" to tell the reader who's talking.

A wave crashed onto the beach thirty yards past the old pine deck. Diana lifted her glass of wine to her lips then set it down again. "No. I don't love him."

Barbara waited, but Diana said nothing more. She looked at the salted rim of her margarita. "But... I saw you. That night."

"Forget about that, Barb. It was nothing. A mistake."

We want to build a world for our readers and invite them to step right in and be a part of it. And to do that, we have to get out of their way. Do we have to completely eliminate use of "she said"? No, it does sometimes have a place, especially when clarity is needed. But we do a service to the reader by keeping it at a minimum and putting our writing energy into world building instead.

It takes time to master writing in a seamless way, where the events and your characters' dialog tell the story without the obvious presence of the marionette master who is making them do and say those things. But when you do master it, your writing will come to life. Your readers will become one with the story you are telling.

The experience of reading seamless writing is sometimes like watching a movie. We see the sights and hear the sounds and may even forget that we are reading a story.



Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this mini writing workshop.

The writing workshop collection


You can browse my collection of writing workshop posts in the links below.

Mini workshop series


Short posts on specific writing topics:

Mini workshops in 50-word prompt posts

Brief workshops, typically 3-5 paragraphs, at the top of 50-word short story challenge posts:

In-depth workshop posts

The original writing workshop series: Thank you, as always, for reading, following, upvoting, connecting, HODL'ing, resteeming, laughing, sharing, and being you.

Note: The image is sourced from Pixabay.

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As you rightly say, dear @jayna, writing dialogues is one of the most demanding tasks of writing. How do you make them natural and not empty? After all, dialogues are literary artifices and not real conversations, no matter how sometimes it seems, just as characters are not real people even if we try to imitate them. I think the most difficult question for me is to understand the degree of distortion demanded by dialogue according to the style of my story.
Writing dialogues is definitely a talent and an aresanal challenge.
Thank you for sharing this useful material for writers.

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I am just beginning to edit my manuscript and my dialog is awful! This will help so much!

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Gr8 writing workshop jayna.

Dialogue was always my shortcoming in my fiction. It's improved a lot over the last two years but there is always room to learn.

This post reminded me of the rules, which I needed as I've haven't been writing a lot of fiction recently. Maybe it's time to write a flash in your excellent competition 😉

You pulled the dialogue together with environment/action so nicely, especially in the third section.

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Glad to hear you got something out of the tips, @raj808! We are all a work in progress. 😁

It does take time to develop the craft, Write with confidence, and produce high quality fiction. I find if I’m not working at it, I’m slipping! I guess it’s a bit like exercise, huh!

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Should have paid more attention to this awesome series some time ago. It will certainly help in my current work. Although right now I'm sticking to a cliché style for a reason. Some of the lines can be better for sure. After finishing the draft, though.

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Thanks a lot for this post. It is quite educational.