Taali Kase

Taali Kase was my first child....my babygirl. My birth with her was crazy, scary as hell, confusing and regretful. So many emotions that can't be described unless you was in my head. I was put in the hospital at 23 weeks with high blood pressure which caused me to stay in the hospital until I delivered. The night before I delivered I knew something wasn't right because I didn't sleep and babygirl was going crazy in my stomach. That morning I was scheduled for an ultrasound. The nurse came and got me and started before the doctors came in and she was making faces so I knew something was wrong but I just put it out my mind and waited to hear what the doctors had to say. The nurse took pictures and told me that the blood flow to Taali was being restricted..... So many questions were going through my mind I didn't know what to ask or say. I was taken back to my room and the doctors came in and told me that they would be performing a c-section in a few hours. But that few hours turned into two hours, and I was being rushed to have an emergency c-section. Taali Kase was delivered at 25 weeks and was only 1 pound and 11 inches. I didn't get to see her until the next day because I was so drugged up. When I finally got to see her I could believe how tiny and adorable she was.... I spent every hour and day with her that I could and never wanted to leave her. Everyday the doctors had negative things to say about her health which made me really really uneasy and wanted to move her to another hospital that was more supporative. My precious babygirl lived for 40 long hard days and passed away on December 3, 2016.... I would never forget that whole day and the details. I wish it could of been me instead of my child. I miss her so much.