Haven't even had the first glass of Apothic wine from Starbucks. Learned this from Blue Flame near Cheesecake Factory in Tampa.
Catch the Megabus on West Peachtree early morning, ride to Orlando. Rent the UHaul double-back wheel off Semoran and ride to Tampa. Got to see homey from law school, class of 1996. Not too may people left in west, central Florida.
As night falls, ride the UHaul 75 north to Cafe Risque; they give showers (to truckers). Leave the Risque for the drive-through liquor store, before or after exit 374. Passenger can get f*ck*d at this point. I've driven the 16 hours solo before.
Ride to the last exit in Florida, before Georgia to Little Foot Massage. Say, "Hi," to Chu. Take the truck to Tifton for drop-off or repeat sentences one through twelve. Either way, Megabus stops in Jacksonville, Tifton, Orlando and maybe even Tampa. Anyway, any time spent at Blue Flame is optional, tipsy laughing at the horny people dance to Yo Digety (Teddy Riley)