Just Because You're in the Mafia...

in funny •  7 years ago 

IMG_0010.jpg

Doesn't mean you need to tell everyone you're in the mafia. I was at a thrift store the other day and this guy is getting like eerily close to me. He starts asking me if I want any pocket watches - like old timey pocket watches. I tell him that I have a phone because it's 2018 and that I have no need for pocket watches to tell time, although I admit they look cool. He looks me up and down, and then says..."hey, I'm in the mafia."

I was startled...I mean what a jarring admission. First off, it was hard to take him seriously. I mean if you are really in the mafia, wouldn't be like fight club - First rule of mafia, don't talk about mafia. So I just said, "cool." He then said, "take a picture of me on your phone...so you always remember what the fucking mafia looks like." I felt obligated. I mean, he was super confident and I liked his jacket.

He just kind of followed me around the store as I shopped after that. He told me not to buy anything plaid as it was sending a statement that said, "I have no money." Look, I don't know who this stranger was, but I can almost 100% tell you, he was full of shit. Plaid looks great on me.

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!