Several years ago, I sold a car through Shift, a service in my state that connects used car sellers and buyers. Apparently, I’m still on Shift’s mailing list. Today, the company sent me an e-mail explaining that its data on buyers’ preferences for political parties had been analyzed. And it invited me to click the link to shop for “Republican Cars” or “Democrat Cars” (depending on one’s own preference, of course).

This seemed a big step, but I was not too surprised. Studies have shown several differences in people based upon their politics, so why not car preferences? I clicked the link, looking forward to learning which kinds of cars were Democratic and which were Republican. However, both links took me to the same list: it’s a list of ALL cars Shift is selling. Both political parties: same list.

That was when I went back to the e-mail and noticed the * asterisk that this offer is only good on April 1. That was all it said, but we can fill in some more details on our own:

“Happy April Fool’s Day, fool. You’ve been punked.”

There is no list for different political affiliations; it’s all a joke. And this company did a nice job because they probably got plenty of curious clicks on that ad campaign. Designing the e-mail probably took about 10 minutes. A select few probably saw it as a joke from the beginning. Some gullible people like me will figure it out fairly quickly while others may never figure it out. Many people probably tweeted and shared those links with their friends.

End result: Nobody got hurt or offended. Shift got some extra clicks and additional buzz until people realized it was a hoax. Well done.

I wish I could say that was the only April Fool’s joke that fooled me, but I have kids. Part of being a parent is to play along with any fun ideas they have. Plastic spiders, flour in the sugar jar, mustard in the toothpaste; things like that. One of my kids made me toast for breakfast and mixed in a bunch of garlic salt with the butter. It was nasty. Our other kid changed the language on my phone to Japanese. When I asked her to fix it, she told me she had done so, but left it on Dutch for the rest of the day.

All things considered, we got off fairly easily today, since some years there are a lot more jokes and practical witchcraft. Perhaps this April 1 was light because April Fool’s Day fell on the same day as Easter, which has not happened in 60 years.

I’ll Admit Any Mistakes When the Time Comes

Also, someone else told me that I need to admit my mistake for posting a few months ago about Shohei Ohtani, the Japanese (now American) baseball star. I had recommended that he should sign with a National League team in the U.S. (where the pitchers also have a turn as hitters), since he wanted to play on both sides of the ball. I suggested a National League team would be a lower-pressure situation for him if it turns out that he isn’t a great hitter, because an American League team will be relying on him for more production if it uses him as a pitcher and designated hitter in separate games.

So someone said I should admit my mistake, since Ohtani signed with an American League team (as every single expert besides me predicted, so it wasn’t much of a surprise). And it looks like he can hit a little.

Hit a little? Yes, he got one hit on his first day. And he pitched nicely today. I never said he couldn’t pitch; he’s a very good pitcher. I questioned whether he can hit productively in Major League Baseball. At the moment, he has one hit and we are three games into a season that lasts 162 games, so it seems JUST a bit early to be weighing in with any judgments.

Even though he got a hit in his first MLB at bat, I’ll stick by my skepticism and my belief that he may struggle as a hitter. If not right away, wait until he’s had a few months’ worth of at bats and the opposing teams have a book on his strengths and weaknesses. Scouting reports will point out his weaknesses; everyone has at least one. And when they learn how to pitch to him as a hitter, watch whether he’s able to make adjustments and still be productive.

I Won’t Eat Any Crow

Therefore, I will not eat any crow today. For those readers for whom English is not a first language or who may not be familiar with this expression, “eating crow” means apologizing publicly for one’s mistakes.

Come to think of it, there are several idioms in English that involve crows. If you have a crow to pluck with me, we’ll settle it soon enough. A few months might seem like a long time to wait, but I’ll be up with the crows and it’s not that far the way the crow flies. When I win, I won’t crow about it.

Fuller list of crow idioms: https://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/crow

Okay, enough is enough. I’m feeling like crow bait.

If You Prefer to Eat Crow Literally, Here is Some Inspiration

Pan-fried Crow Filets

Check out Scott Rea’s video on how to prepare these. They sound divine. I’ll pass, but I did watch the video.

Crow on the Bone with Fennel

A MasterChef contestant tried impressing the judges with this one. It made an impact, but not in the right way.

Frying Crows in Lithuania

The feast is on and guess what’s for dinner.

I hear it tastes a lot like chicken. After a few beers, I’d probably try it, but I’d rather not. I might go for some humble pie though.

Top photo: Public domain from Pixabay. Crow photo: Creative Commons via Wikipedia by Dickdaniels. Shift e-mail is courtesy of Shift.