Retro Games More Enjoyable In Japanese: Michigan (PS2)

It’s not news to say the Japanese get tons of stuff the rest of the world doesn’t, but at least they throw non-Asian gamers like myself a bone every now and then. When they do, it's usually a basic translation/localization for the target market, and this process sometimes leads to content being cut, censorship to appease the new region, and other snips and slices due to lack of money, resources, time, or fucks. Most changes aren't important and don't impact the experience whatsoever. While interesting to trivia buffs, nobody lost sleep over the removal of crosses in Castlevania's 8-bit backgrounds or the Goddess sprite from Final Fantasy VI donning an extra inch of underwear, and if you did, might I recommend a Benadryl before bed? I'm more interested in titles where the non-Japanese version is clearly inferior. Times where studios left something substantial out of the mix, something integral to how much enjoyment it's possible to mine from the final product, which makes importing the Japanese version either necessary or at least worth your while. This series aims to showcase my favorite examples, but if you have suggestions, speak up in the comments. Let the games begin:

Michigan (PS2, 2004)

What Is It...?

A survival horror game from the twisted psyche of director Goichi Suda, aka Suda51, Michigan casts you as a nameless, voiceless cameraman for ZaKa TV news. Your job, along with sound engineer Jean-Phillipe Brisco, is to follow a reporter from behind the camera, Blair Witch-style, as she investigates strange happenings on the foggy streets and equally foggy buildings of Chicago, which...is totally what you'd expect from a game called 'Michigan'. Naturally.

Moving on.

The job sounds incredible, but you gotta realize ZaKa's not like most news agencies. Being more concerned with ratings than the safety of the on-air talent, ZaKa hits viewers with the type of raw footage other networks avoid out of a desire to keep their headquarters un-vandalized. If it’s bizarre, provocative, and/or makes you question your humanity, ZaKa broadcasts it. If someone dies in pursuit of a scoop, well, there are six more reporters waiting in the wings to take over. Just don’t run out of tape or battery power before you get the full story, or ZaKa will can your ass like 29-cent generic brand creamed corn. If you ever dreamed of working for a place capable of delivering Olympic-level competition to 4chan for the title of 'Most Offensive Media Outlet on the Face of the Planet', I've already lost you to the bowels of eBay and/or YouTube. You can thank me with an upvote + resteem when you get back.

You Want The Japanese Version Because...

Michigan received a multi-language translation (including French, English, Italian, and Spanish) and was released in PAL territories by 505 Games as Michigan: Report From Hell, but the job was rushed, botched, and incomplete. It also apparently happened without Goichi Suda’s knowledge, which raises all sorts of questions by itself, but I'll let the Internet Legal Team work that angle. Those guys can agree on anything!

In addition to suffering English voice work which makes one long for the days of the “Jill sandwich”, the European version of Michigan differs from its Japanese counterpart in two significant areas. First, Grasshopper Studios contracted Taiwanese fashion model Yinling to use both in the game's advertising and as one of the reporters, and created bonus stages where the player dutifully follows her around like a lost puppy. Grasshopper’s contract with Yinling only covered the Asian market though, so when Michigan lurched to European shores like a cheesy Doctor Who extra in an ill-fitting costume rug, Yinling’s content got the ol’ chop-suey, as we say in the biz. (Note to self: no one in the biz says this--quit saying it.)

Losing Yinling's a bummer, sure, but fun as they are, her side-quests and bonus picture collectibles don’t affect the main story. What does is a bug in the EU game’s menu preventing you from accessing the video replay feature. In Michigan, you can re-watch any cinematic sequence you’ve unlocked through play from the options menu. What’s more, while playing the game, there are four secret video tapes to collect throughout your assignments. Each details a fraction of the back-story and how the events depicted all fit together. You can find these tapes in the European release, but there’s no way to view them once you’ve done so, meaning even if you achieve 100% completion you'll still be in the dark without a FAQ, and even then good luck because this is a Suda51 title. The ‘replay’ option in the European release takes you to an interactive mini-game where your job is to film the various ladies of ZaKa TV while they strip dance for you.

On stage.

In lingerie.

To a throbbing, pulse-pounding techno club mix.

Yup, there goes my daily quota of facepalms.

In hindsight, I have no one to blame but myself for expecting something tasteful from a survival horror game which rewards you for video taping your reporter as she's either showering or being devoured by a living case of 'vagina dentata', and heeeeeeeey, there's my NSFW tag right on schedule! How ya doin', buddy?

image from Hardcore Gaming 101

I expect we'll be seeing you again in the future. Drop by any time. Always a pleasure.

Dear god, I just...excuse me, I need to open a window or something. Where the hell'd my wife put that brain bleach?