Grief: The Shadow Side of Joy

I am grateful to be here and have this place to express myself. Just wanted to start by saying that.

Life is so rich when we are sharing ourselves in some capacity that is authentic, isn't it?

Personally, I love writing and sharing about insights and concerns or anything that's real and engage with people around the topic.

Grief is such a rich topic I'm finding because it's something we can try to avoid but will unyieldingly confront us to accept and face at some point. I'm finding that having a thriving relationship with grief is crucial not only to us emotionally, but physically, relationally, mentally and ultimately spiritually as well.

Grief gives us a chance to feel and heal, becoming more intimate and in-touch with the vulnerability of life. It helps me to see people, have compassion and empathy and really connect. A friend of mine said that it welcomes people to come close to us when we grieve, which I love because it points to how we care for one another and don't need to be alone in our grieving. Grief can be a shared phenomenon and build trust, intimacy and bonds that bring us closer and make us feel loved as a human being, which makes us feel whole as a spiritual being.

For me, grief has brought me to understand joy. My joy is now complete and wholehearted because it is not a joy that is separate from grief. It includes grief which gives it a whole new quality. Grief/sorrow and joy/fulfillment/happiness are two sides of the same coin and can never be separate.

What a journey this being human thing is! With grief it becomes more real and opens us to human relationship. It opens the door further to love. What are you not grieving that needs to be grieved? Sometimes we need help. Sometimes we just need someone to say it's ok and the floodgates can open.

Grief is beautiful as is true joy. As I'm writing this I want to say I love you to whoever is reading this because that's what grief has made me into, a lover.

Another cool person made a good point that grief can be overdone and I would say that then it's not true grief. That is what I'll call despair which could also be described as depression. This is no bueno and there is a point to move on from grieving. Grief should be full and complete and lead to a lasting joy of being alive. Everyone's process is unique as they are but we all share the same fundamental grief experience. It actually unites us.

So go forth and grieve dear kin. Feel it fully and move on into deeper states of ecstatic joy with me or without me, together or alone. We're all in this together and sometimes it's a clear hot spring moment and sometimes its a muddy shit moment and it's all ok even when it's clearly not.

With all my love,
Jason