What does it mean to deserve something

We sometime get the wrong impression that simply because we exist we deserve to have everything we want.

Especially in today's world of participation trophies, where everybody seems to be more concerned about not hurting each other's feelings rather than living in reality.

This type of behaviour can lead you to a fake sense of entitlement and constant dissatisfaction for where you are right now. So instead of trying to earn what you need you are complaining that you don't already have it, unfortunately complaining works only when you were wrong to begin with, when you complain and you are wrong nobody is going to help you.

Deserving something means having the skills to gain and keep that thing, as a simple rule of thumb if you don't have something you probably don't deserve it. I am not saying that that it can change in the future, but in order for that to change you have to earn it.

Sometime we are exposed to unfair life situations like abuse, this might leave you with an increase perception that you deserve things that you don't have because your deficiencies exists based on a scenario in which you had no responsibility at the time, like being abused as a child. It is not like you just spent most of your time in your room playing video games and now you are unhappy because you are not a billionaire.

For the long term victim of abuse it is rather unfair the fact that he or she has so many deficiencies, but this doesn't mean that the world has to bend over backwards and provide for people who have not earn the skills to gain what they need. Because that would be an unhealthy dependent relationship which is going to lead to a deterioration in the quality of life for both parties.

Charity benefits the most the people that truly can't provide for themselves like the handicapped ones or the mentally retarded, you will have a much better quality of life when you provide for yourself, and if you have an able mind and body there is really no excuse for not doing so.

Perhaps the only thing that it is impossible to offer as charity is love, charity works for material possessions like food, shelter, money etc. But because love is an involuntary response, it is impossible to give it to the people who need it the most, because you can take that decision consciously.

Your love must be earned, this is why you wont get in a relationship or sleep with someone just because you feel pity for him or her, and if you do that is probably not love. As much as it is a charity act, an unfair trade, where one of the partner is getting more than the other, which makes things problematic to say at least. You are not exchanging love as much you do company, sex or other different services.