How lasting happiness can be yours today by living in the 'Now'

Too often people believe that once they’ve obtained that goal they’ll be happy, for example, “when I change jobs”, “if my business takes of”, “when the project is complete”, “after we’re married”, “if I lose some weight”. Unfortunately it doesn’t work like that, happiness isn't achieved through any accomplishment.

Happiness comes from within, it is only a state of mind, a choice. People come and go, relationships change, possessions get old, fortunes are made, and fortunes are lost. Everything changes, it’s meant to. Life is fluid.

Emotions Start with Thoughts

Some people have nothing yet they emit a constant joy, while others who seem to have it all and are on the brink of destroying themselves. It’s obviously not about anything like material possessions, or relationships, but more so emotions.

However, it all starts with our thoughts. Thoughts come from how we react to situations, they’re the building blocks of emotions. So, what we think about a situation determines the resulting emotions. For example, two people might experience the exact same situation yet have different thoughts about it... one person experiences the emotion of anger, while the other experiences the emotion of sadness.

This is an important distinction because you can control your thoughts, and whether the focus is on the positive or negative aspects. Of course, sometimes difficult situations will occur that will give way to runaway thoughts, it’s only a natural part of being human.

Happiness Step #1: Strive to Increase Positivity

Try to focus on the positive aspects of situations, it results in positive thoughts and therefore emotions, and helps you become “more present”. If you choose to adopt the following habits you will experience an increase in positivity.

Express gratitude. Be thankful for your past positive experiences and what you currently have, it helps release negativity. Gratitude instantly connects you to the feeling of love, and where love resides, fear and other negative emotions cannot.

Try expressing 10 things you are grateful for every day, and speak them out loud if possible. Make sure it’s coming from the heart and be detailed.

Meditate. The practice of meditation expands awareness and improves the connection between mind, body and soul. It helps release negative emotions that might be holding you back, and is definitely one of the most effective ways to increase your positivity.

To mediate find a quiet and comfortable place. Sit or lie down, then close your eyes. Take a few deep breaths and start to allow yourself to relax. While breathing deeply, feel yourself letting go of whatever emotions you’re holding onto, let go a little more with each breathe.

Give unconditionally to others. Share your skills, share your advice, and help people out. Do not hesitate or doubt your value, even the smallest gestures can make a massive difference in someone’s life. It will make you feel great; you’ll reap the reward in increased positivity.

Breathe fully. A revealing research study by Pierre Phillipot found that certain emotional states are associated with distinct respiration patterns. Participants were instructed to generate emotions such as sadness, fear, anger and happiness to the best of their ability, while their respiration patterns were closely observed.

Each emotion was associated with a distinct respiration pattern. For example, when the participants were happy they breathed slowly and fully, when they felt anxious or afraid they breathed more quickly and shallowly. In a follow-up study the researchers instructed a different group of participants to breathe in the same patterns they had observed in the first study. The participants started to feel the corresponding emotion to whatever breathing pattern they used!

Breathe slowly and fully, it enables better thinking and makes you feel more positive.

Happiness Step #2: The True Key - Become More Present

Don’t put your happiness on hold because you’re waiting for something to happen, it might not. There are no guarantees you’re going to get that new job, car or anything for that matter.

If you detach yourself from the outcome and enjoy the journey you’ll become fully present, living in the moment, and truly experiencing what life is about. You will have found happiness, all from within. It’s contagious too... others will begin to pick up your habit, then it’ll be reflected back to you.

All we really have is today, so take stock of what you really need, and try to appreciate your life more with each passing day.

“Happiness, true happiness, is an inner quality. It is a state of mind. If your mind is at peace, you are happy. If your mind is at peace, but you have nothing else, you can be happy. If you have everything the world can give - pleasure, possessions, power - but lack peace of mind, you can never be happy.” - Dada Vaswani

Have gratitude, help others, and most of all be happy.