I am just preparing for my dialysis for today and I already had bathed myself up and also had my breakfast sandwich which loving parents had a trouble going to the nearby 7-Eleven store to buy it for me because it is what I wanted to eat for breakfast today because I am already getting bored to the taste of the stir-fried noodles that I am having every morning.
This sandwich like any other sandwiches has cheese in it but that is okay because there isn't much cheese in this breakfast of mine today and I am also taking my phosphate binder and calcium so that it will take care of the phosphorus in the cheese and the phosphates in the pepperoni.
So I had a good breakfast although I only had one of this but it is already okay for me since I cannot have much of foods in general because it feels like my body or digestive system cannot handle the load of food like other normal people because if I am weak in which it is the case then I presume that my insides are weak too and I should consider that which is why I just do not eat much except in dialysis.
But if I have the opportunity to have a good appetite I just eat as much as I can take which is again smaller portion than a normal person eats. But I lament that fact that I have a poor appetite and I feel like I will going to leave this world not seeing an improvement on that issue of mine.
So I just pray to God to at least will it for me to regain back my enjoyment on food because that is the only thing I am wishing for right now since I could not travel, have vacations, socialize with other people, go somewhere, have a trip, visit my relatives, go for mini vacations, or even go to the church. I missed those things already and it isn't much maye of a prayer and longing to gain back my normal body function like enjoyment of food.