7 Rules for Remarkable Romance

It can seem like romantic love has so many pitfalls that it’s nearly impossible to achieve, let alone sustain. It’s easy to get mixed up in the conflicting advice, stereotypes, and less-than-desirable role models prevalent in popular culture. But of course it’s just as easy to choose the ideas that will make you so much happier. A loving partnership should be the simplest and most rewarding of relationships. Here are some powerful thoughts to help you visualize, create, share, appreciate, and relish lifelong love.

1. You have to love yourself first. It can’t be repeated often enough. Love and happiness come from within. Keep your sense of self, build your own confidence, and maintain your own full and fulfilling life throughout a relationship. Encourage your partner to do the same. When you each take care of your own needs and happiness first, you’ll have more energy, creativity, and experience to share with one another.

2. Your way is the right way. Forget traditional roles and societal expectations. You and your partner get to make your relationship your own. Move at your own pace, show love in your own ways, and be the couple you want to be. Embrace and celebrate your own strange and wonderful version of love.

3. Relationships should be joyful. The point of a great relationship is to enrich your life. You can and should live happily ever after! Stay focused on positivity, joy, and fun together. When you believe your relationship can and should be a source of happiness, then you’ll naturally nourish the positive things.

4. Like attracts like. Your thoughts and behaviors will inevitably have an impact on, and evoke the same from, your partner. So it’s important to gain awareness of how you draw out the best or worst in each other. Focus on your own positive thoughts and behaviors and you will soon see more of the same from your partner.

5. Mystery is magic. Even while you increase your intimacy, understanding, and commitment, there will still be some element of mystery involved in love. Keep your mind open for ongoing exploration and discovery—of each other and of how fabulous your relationship can be. Allow your partner to keep surprising you. Allow yourself to keep surprising your partner. And allow the Universe to keep surprising you both with new heights of joy you hadn’t yet imagined.

6. Relationships take time and effort. Even the happiest relationships have struggles. Don’t get discouraged when things aren’t perfect! Relationship challenges are just opportunities for increased intimacy. Dig in to your difficulties with the goal of finding the love and growth waiting just below the surface. Fear, anger, and resentment can be flipped upside down in an instant when you take the time to figure them out and make the effort to connect with your partner.

7. You’re in this together. Remember that you chose your partner, and your partner chose you, for good reasons. If your differences occasionally discourage you, focus on how much you have in common. Stay friends. Stay on the same team. Stay true to your shared values. Share your journey through time and space with plenty of high fives, comfort hugs, and happy dances. Visualize all the ways that your shared happiness, abundance, and love can have a powerful effect on the world.