The Porcelain Goddess

Let it wash over you. Watch, her, as she basks in her septastic glory. Gaze upon the prestige of her throne, as her slick and wet albino skin, glistens, in the elegant rays of the Oregon sun.

This, ladies and gents, is the real Porcelain Goddess. Did you think that it was just a tall tale?

Well, think again...

Stark and commanding, she sits, spewing out delightfully yellowish-green colored, imitation refuse. How beautiful she is. How, stimulating. I could hardly keep my composure as we drove past this gem. We found her, sunbathing, just south of a small town called, Bandon, Oregon. I did not see it right at first, but my girl, @audiefaith, turned the car around to give it a thrice over. I guess she was getting a little turned on, too...

We parked beside her majesty. We fearfully opened our car doors, with our heads down, hoping that we would not offend her majesty and be struck by the instant death of her Goddessly lightning bolts. I fell to my face, crying.

Could it be? Had we really found her???

She looked down from her high perch, superimposed against the Olympus clouds in which she was shrouded. Only, for a moment, our eyes, met...

WE HAVE FOUND THE ONE.

WE HAVE FOUND THE GODDESS.

TELL ME, THAT OREGON DOESN'T HAVE THE BEST WEED. THIS IS PROOF. FUCKIN' TRY ME.

P.S. If you live near Bandon, and you need a septic system put in, I'm assuming you can call these guys, whoever the hell they are. Crazy cool marketing idea, though. This thing sits right off the highway, almost jutting over the sidewalk.