Today has become a really exciting day. Because a number of things have happened that are somehow connected. First, a colleague of mine is in the process of changing his customer base from larger to smaller. Because he thinks he would be better suited for it. When fighting with some big companies. The project took place because of the number of people and spread around the world. It's not just his thing. The second was with one of my clients, who equipped a group of employees in my administrative course. Although most of them were not interested or capable of playing that character. And thirdly, I was in a meeting where I got the idea for something and because that’s my idea, I should take it forward. Although I am not in favor of applying the concept.
These are sufficiently visible and take different forms but what is interesting is how we judge them based on the results. My coworker is feeling like a failure. Although he is very good at what he does. My clients feel like they’ve gone over their heads now. Because the content of the session was beyond their comprehension and my idea will be judged on the basis of my activities. Rather it is the activity of a person capable of developing, applying and implementing.
The problem is when we identify our failures even though our skillset was not appropriate. Then we consider ourselves proverbial, the fish climbs a tree. Failure may be due to us. But it's not our fault my colleague didn't really like his customer base. The participants were chosen by their organization and I can't help it if there is no open source to advance this idea without me.
What matters more than recognition of failure is the reasons for failure and whether corrective action is needed. It is not always possible to "retrain" skills. So if there is value in performing the activity, new resources may need to be brought in and I demand more efficiency and attention than being able to provide it. Although I have more time to commit to it.
Failure is an interesting concept when it comes to judgment and I’ve written a few posts on it over the years. But it is a failure that happens before it is recognized as a failure. For example, placing the wrong person in a position or course, or failing to get the wrong person an idea forward, is not the time to perform the task. Yes, there are ways to reduce the risk (like doing pre-mortems). But a person can only do so much and when they try their best. Then they can do nothing else.
While talking to my coworker, I was talking about how intuitively we feel that we judge fairly. Because we do a lot of things a day, regardless of whether we were right or wrong. We judge the people we see and when we give judgment we think we have made a good call. But we don't know until we get confirmation. But usually it is not. However, when we get the response and it is proven wrong, it goes beyond our experience. One wrong judgment in the last 1000, it happened that we only got feedback on 2 out of these thousands. We gave a 50% strike rate, when we felt we were batting at 99.9.
I have friends who tell me they are good judges of character. Yet in another conversation they recently met that person. How could they complain without what they expected. At what point do they acknowledge that their verdict is not as good as it sounds? A playful horse to handle insights. Because it informs our judgment based on past experience of correct feeling. However, it does not necessarily carry all the information that it was wrong all the time.
Many people like to identify themselves with their own failures. Lots of people just like to recognize their successes. This makes it like a gambler who simply brags for an odd victory in a sea of losses. This is certainly an unhealthy position, if the losses are never integrated into the world-view for the development of better justice. Or those who, like frustration, do not acknowledge all the feelings that can only be in them, but focus only on the negative ones.
It is an unbalanced view of the world and causes much more pain than it solves. Because it limits the amount of information available for future decision making. And of course, it places a cycle of polarization between the unbalanced and the sensitive state rather than the more numerous ones. We are constantly pushed and pulled by intense finality and forget that most lives live in the middle.
Some people adopt the "failure is not an option" approach but in reality it survives in situations that do not claim it. It means not doing at all, exploring the possibilities and possibilities. The power to not examine any organ. I would rather fail than live in a cage of my own design. I would have been above my head rather than cruising through the clouds. But I want to be able to recognize not being ready and the possibility of a change of direction. I think it’s a skill in itself. Both the ability to recognize and prepare for a pivot.
Failure is a human concept and occurs entirely in the head. But if we consider it well and learn from it, it usually costs a lot more to the lesson than the cost of failure. It is even possible to take this lesson from others. But at least sometimes there is nothing better than paying a direct price.