The social messages around us sometimes set us up with unrealistic expectations.
Among those — perhaps developed as early as childhood — is the expectation that we maintain and keep our friendships more or less "forever."
Many people accept the reality that friendships may sometimes be bumpy rides and require work, but we are less prepared for the idea that sometimes we have to "unfriend" someone, and not just in that artificial Facebook way.
I quite often work with clients who are struggling to let go of the idea that they somehow "failed" because a close long-term friendship ended. But it happens more often than we think.
In many cases, we end up ending a friendship because it feels "toxic" in some way. We spend time with someone, and instead of it being a positive experience, we actually feel drained after each encounter.
Some years back, I found myself having to end a friendship with someone I had basically "been through thick and thin" with. The sad realization I had slowly drawn was that she was a terminal user and mooch, and I had for many years strongly argued with other friends who kept saying "you know she's just USING you, right?"
Sometimes we can get so attached to keeping the friendship that we lose healthy friendships in service of not facing the truth about a toxic friendship. And that can be because we're not willing to admit that we were being wrongly used or deceived.
Even bad endings cause pain and sorrow... and it's perfectly reasonable to "mourn" the end of a negative connection, because at one time it very likely had many beautiful aspects.
Thanks for reading, and Bright Blessings!
This post is 100% powered up!
You are not alone!
(Graphic is our own)
The White Light Express Mission Statement:
Since October 2001, the mission of the White Light Express has been to offer healing and transformation through focused positive intention, meditation and prayer. Right Thought is the first step toward Right Action and consciousness. We believe that “holding the vibration” is a profound task and our divine destiny.
We appreciate you following us and upvoting if you feel moved to do so — we also really appreciate comments and feedback! If you enjoyed this post and think others might enjoy reading it, please give it a re-steem! We love you already, because across all the myriad beliefs we hold, Love IS the answer!
In addition to our blog here on Steemit, you can also find us on the White Light Express web site, on our verified Facebook page and on our twitter feed.