Goodness knows, we're all going to experience disappointment, at some point in our lives. Much as we might like to think otherwise, it's simply part of the human experience that sometimes things are just not going to work out as expected.
People let us down.
We get passed over for a promotion.
A relationship doesn't work out.
A friendship falls apart.
We fail an important test, even though we studied for it.
A beloved pet dies.
Disappointment comes in many different forms, and it's not unusual that it is accompanied by anger.
We feel that we were somehow wronged, on account of the unfavorable outcome. It may even feel like "people" or "the world" was against us, somehow.
Disappointment — and typically most of any attendant anger — is just a natural part of being human. It's very unlikely that any of us get through life unscathed!
The danger is that we sometimes allow disappointment — and particularly a series of disappointments — to become bitterness. And then we start living with a sense of resentment, and a pervasive backdrop of barely hidden anger.
The thing about this kind of bitterness and anger is that it is rather like acid (and NOT the "fun" kind!), it's corrosive to whatever it touches — namely, YOURSELF — and other people tend to stay well clear of it because it's noxious, dangerous and difficult to handle safely.
There are a couple of ideas I share with people who come to me for counseling.
The first is to simply acknowledge your disappointment. Disappointment happens. Much as something might feel unfair, life doesn't offer a guarantee that things will turn out a particular way.
The second is to remember that setbacks tend to be temporary. If one door closes, another will typically open.
For example, I was laid off — unfairly and without cause — from a good and high paying job in Corporate Banking, back in 2007. However, were it NOT for that event, I would never have taken the chance to set up my full-time private practice as a coach and spiritual counselor. And now I help 100s of people find their way to better lives, which I definitely did not, while in Corporate Banking!
I could choose to carry bitterness around over that dismissal... but instead, I choose to celebrate what arose out of it!
I invite you to do the same in your life; look for any places and be honest about whether you harbor old bitterness... and then make a pact to let go of it!
Thanks for reading, and Bright Blessings to all!
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