Someone asked: When I was young, is it better to lose more ?
The answer is to look at each situation. After suffering a loss, there is a summary and thinking, that is, wealth, the more the better. If you suffer a loss, you do not reflect, and you want to avenge the society, so you should be arrested.
Suffering is not necessarily only suffering, it can also be a subject.
Smart people don't necessarily have to suffer a lot of losses, but every time they suffer from a loss, they can learn from the outside to the inside, and that is to learn thoroughly. Such a person, even if he suffers only three or four losses in his life, is far better than those who have suffered a loss without a long memory, and treat the loss as a meal.
So how do you lose wisely? The following summarizes 3 tips, I hope to inspire you:
See the big in the small
The loss of negligence and mistakes in a trivial matter can be extended to a deeper and more profound association.
Once I went out for a meeting with a few colleagues and the boss of the company, and some accidents caused others to take a taxi, but I could only take the boss's car and let him pick me up.
At that time, I was young and ignorant, so I opened the door and sat in the back seat. The boss didn’t say anything, and drove all the way to the customer, but when he got off the car, he said with a smile:
"Well, the seats in the back of the car are quite comfortable, right?"
I thought the boss was really asking me if I was comfortable, and he nodded quickly, saying that I almost fell asleep in the car comfortably along the way.
It happened that this scene was seen by other colleagues in the same industry, and he calmly pulled me aside and told me not to do this in the future.
I'm still wondering, what's the matter? Did I say something wrong?
As a result, he said, you are stupid, the back seat is for the boss!
It suddenly dawned on me when I heard it. I'm sitting in the back seat of the boss's car, so won't the boss driving in front become my driver?
Thinking of this, I suddenly felt a chill behind my back.
Fortunately, the boss was not careful at the time, he just "beat" me with a smile, and didn't make things difficult for me in the future. But if this is to change an individual boss or become a customer's car, it may leave a bad impression on people, and a major event will be missed later.
In fact, this can't be regarded as a loss in the strict sense. It can even be said that a foot was pulled out of the pit without stepping on the pit before the loss was eaten.
But I still remember it for 7 years until now. If someone really wore small shoes in the workplace because of this thing, I would never forget it for a lifetime.
This incident had a great impact on my later life. It made me think about workplace etiquette.
Where to sit in the car is a small workplace etiquette. But there are other workplace etiquette extended from this, and I began to realize the impact of my words and deeds on the people around me, and I started to pay attention to the responses and feedback of others, and learn to think about things from the perspective of others.
You know, before this, I lived quite heartless. In the workplace, I dare to say anything, do things informally, obediently, the left ear enters the right ear out, and I never think about it.
But now, besides taking a taxi, I take a friend’s car, a business partner’s car, or even someone who’s met for the first time taking me some distance. I will try my best not to sit in the back but choose to sit in the front row.
And this mode of thinking continues to all aspects of my work. For example, when in a meeting, when traveling with colleagues, when dining with customers, when writing emails, and when making calls, I will always think one step further:
How would the other person feel when I made this action and said this sentence? Will it violate any taboos?
Is this the feeling I want the other person to get? If not, how do I hope the other person will feel? What should I do to make the other person feel this way?
What will the other party think if I don't do this? What subsequent effects will this have?
What might the other person want me to do? Can I do it? If not, how can I reject the other party?
The opportunity that inspired me to think about this was the trivial incident when I got in the back seat of the boss's car by mistake.
Learn a whole from one detail and then use this whole to standardize all other details.
This is seeing the big from the small.
learn by analogy
The losses you have suffered in this place, and whether the lessons learned can be applied to that place, is to draw the analogy.
Suffering from a loss by analogy means that you have thoroughly studied the loss. Because you can extract the essence behind it from the surface phenomenon. On the surface, this is the problem, but in fact, you made the mistake. And this mistake will not only be made on this "surface", but you will also make it on other "surfaces."
For example, let me say a problem that most people make when writing work emails:
Long talk, long-winded.
A very simple matter that can be explained in a few sentences, must be written as an 800-word composition. Some people even think of emails as a place to play their literary hobbies and spread a lot of pages of paper. The people who write are happy and the people who read it are really upset.
Even though this is a trivial matter, I once encountered customer complaints, saying that our emails were stinky and long, with no focus. Every time we meet the project progress is very exhausted because the customer has to find really useful information between the lines, which actually wastes a lot of time.
On the surface, this is a poor expression ability, but the deeper nature is that it has not understood the purpose of writing an email.
What is the purpose of writing work emails? 8 words can be summed up:
Inform progress and prompt action.
Informing the progress is divided into to whom the progress is notified and the progress to which step is notified. This involves who you are communicating within the email.
Facing a newbie who has just accepted the project, then the progress is the context of the background, the current project progress, and the work that needs to be taken over by the other party; if you are facing a person who entered the project from the beginning like you, then there is no need Regarding the cause and effect, the best response is to retreat if there is nothing to do.
Promoting action is to simply and clearly inform the other party about the next action.
What to do next, what is the time point, what are the expected effects, and if there are any remedial measures that cannot be achieved, the matter will be over after talking about these points.
Okay, I figure out how to write emails. Is it possible to write work reports? Can also write a planning plan for reference? Can you learn from it when you give a workplace speech?
Everyone may wish to think about it a little further. What is the essence of writing emails, writing plans, making reports, and giving speeches?
is the communication between people.
They all convey your thoughts to the audience's mind through words and language, and finally let the other party accept and approve your thoughts.
Since it is all communication, the pits that have been stepped on in communication are universal, and the losses they have suffered are also in the same line.
Ignoring the communication partner, not sorting out the communication information, and not understanding the purpose of the communication will lead to the communication failure. This has nothing to do with how you communicate.
Understand this, your experience of losing one time is enough to use in various scenarios in the future. This is called an analogy.
The first two techniques have their own focus. The small to see a big disadvantage is vertical and deep, and the inference is horizontal expansion. They are both internally to enhance the depth of self-thinking.
Don't suffer from dark losses
The third technique is biased towards external interpersonal communication.
What is a dark loss? It's that you are at a disadvantage, but only you know that others think everything is calm and the years are good. And once you have eaten a dark loss, there will be a steady stream of dark losses running towards you.
For example, you obviously did all the work, but all the credit was taken away by your colleagues. The boss doesn't know what happened in the middle, just look at the final result, the result is nothing to do with you.
Another example is workplace dumping. You didn't make the mistake. In the beginning, you did enough warnings, but the pig teammates still didn't listen to advice. As a result, they got into a big disaster. In the end, the other party even complained about first. You can only be dumb and eat coptis.
Faced with these situations, you can't expect your boss to know righteousness and bring justice to you. The boss’s thinking about the problem is very simple:
Look at the results, focus on power and responsibility
If the result is good, then the process will not care so much. But the boss will care about who created this good result because next time he will expect more good results.
So if you have been robbed of your credit and you are temporarily unable to "reverse the case" for yourself, then next time, don't stand behind the scenes, but bravely walk to the front and take on more responsibilities, so that your boss can see your will and determination.
When you have achieved a second success with your own skills, find another inadvertent moment to tell your boss that thanks to the successful experience of the previous project, you will be more comfortable this time. This not only implies your past merits but also makes your boss more confident in your future.
This is called revenge for gentlemen, and it is not too late for ten years. The secret loss I had eaten yesterday is all made up for today.
It is also true that the workplace is thrown away.
Knowing that the pig teammates like the wicked to file a complaint first, then keep an eye on them and keep more evidence for work. Important decisions should not be verbal, but all fall on paper.
E-mail exchanges, chat records, and proposal modification opinions, all of which must be in one-to-one correspondence. Whoever said it, who did it, who promoted it, and who was responsible, all have clear responsibilities. In this way, everything has been done with evidence, and it has been in control for 100 years.
In short, you can be a real person, but don't be an honest person. In this regard, there is a way to help you, called posing.
What pose?
I'm not easy to mess with.
This is not easy to provoke, not for you to scold others, but to do things with rules and logic. You are not so easily persuaded, but once persuaded, you will go all out. You are not so bully. Once your interests are violated, you will fight to the end.
By doing this, you will eat a lot of dark losses. Because everyone knows, it's not worth taking advantage of you.
The above is the content of today. Finally, to summarize briefly, there are 3 tips for being smart:
1. Sufferings can be seen in small ways;
2. Suffering can be inferred by analogy;
3. Never suffer a dark loss;
For Everyone =)