Assalamualaikum everyone. I hope you all are doing fine. Today I'm gonna be talking about how can we bring improvement in our interpersonal skills which I learned in my 'Human interaction and Ethical practices' class last week.

Our teacher teaches us things in a very friendly yet professional way which makes us understand everything easily.

First of all what are interpersonal skills?

Interpersonal skills

Interpersonal or soft skills are the qualities & behaviors that we show while interacting with the environment/people. Can inculde communication, conflict management, leadership, emotional intelligence etc.

https://www.oberlo.com/blog/interpersonal-skills
Multiple studies shows, Interpersonal skills can really compensate somewhat for not having superior cognitive intelligence.

So how can we improve them?
To improve interpersonal skills, We need to identify first that WHERE do we actually need to improve.

Identify developmental need first

Development need is the specific area where a person needs to change/improve. Developmental needs can be identified

1. First recognize the areas that need developmet. Reflect on past experiences to realize that in this thing we've had repeatedly difficulty.
2. Think of solicit feedback we've received. Eg 5 people told me that I'm not a good leader, Then becoming a better leader would be one of my developmental need.
3. Ask the opinion of the people who know us well to identify needs for improvement.

After getting aware of the improvement area, we can bring an improvement by applying the model ABCDE.

Model for Improving Interpersonal skills

A-Goals or desired state of affairs:

A goal is what we want to accomplish as a result of our effort. We need to know at which area we need to improve ourselves and then make a goal. When we make a perfect goal, it motivates us.

Goal setting guidlines

There are some goal setting guidlines with the help of which we can have a perfect goal.

1. we should state each goal as a positive statement. what we have to do rather what we don't have to. Eg if someone wants to loose weight, he should say, I'll eat fruits and home food from today rather than saying I'll not eat rice, sugar, oily food etc.
2. Formulate specific goals. Goals such as 'be successful' is kinda vague to serve as a guide to daily action. So we should state specifically, what we mean by success (eg become a lawer or graduate with 1st division).
3. Concise goals. A useful goal is expressed in a short and punchy statement you know. We dont need to give unnecessary information.
4. We should set realistic goals that represents the right amount of challange. Goals that seems impossible and are beyond our capabilites can lead to frustration as there is a good change of failing. Eg I'll try to get 1st division rather than i have to get 4 by 4 gpa (not applicable to everyone).
5. Goals for different time periods such as daily (eg excercise), short range (1 week to year eg finding a new job), medium range(2 to 5 years eg education or training), long range(5 years or beyond/eg life style).

B-Assesssing Reality:

The second step of the model is Assess how far we're from acheiving our goal. Where we're standing right now with complete honesty. What is the current condition or situation?.

C-An Action Plan:

Its a series of steps to achieve a goal without which the goal would be difficult to achieve. Eg if someones goal is to become a bussiness owner, an action plan should be saving money, developing contacts etc.

D-Feedback on actions:

The 4th step is to see the effects. We need to take feedbackon the consequences of our actions. We should encourage others to give us an honest feedback so that we can know, how much we've been improved.

E-Frequent practice:

The final step is making true skill development possible. We've to keep practicing regularly until the achieved goal becomes a positive and actual habit.

So this was the ABCDE model for improving interpersonal skills.
Let me write an example of the whole model too which I wrote in a test paper given by teacher yesterday.

Example of the ABCDE model for improving Interpersonal skills

Goal

I want to improve my speaking (communication) skills till next month.

Assessing reality

Now my skills are very bad. I'm not able to talk to people when around 2 or more.

Action plan

I'm/will going/go to different ceremonies and crowdy places where I've a good opportunity to interact with people.

Feedback

I'll encourage people to tell me with time to time that how much I'm getting improved.

Frequent practice

I'll keep practicing until it becomes positive and actual habit. As it must be integrated into my usual way of conducting myself. So that I'll be able to talk or interact with people everytime easily and people would feel good while talking to me.

I tried my best to write everything on my own here. I hope you learned and enjoyed reading it.

Special Mentions to:
@hassanabid
@rashid001
@haidermehdi
@steemit-pak
Thankyou.

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