THE PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIP102
WHAT SHOULD YOU DO IF YOU YELL?
No matter how effective your yelling prevention approach is, you will occasionally raise your voice. That's Okay. Accept responsibility and apologize, and your children will learn an essential lesson: we all make errors and must apologize.
If your children yell, remind them of their limits and that shouting is not an acceptable mode of communication. They must understand that you are willing to listen as long as they show respect.
Allowing yourself time to cool off before speaking to your children when you are unhappy or overwhelmed is a good example.
You will assist them in developing lifelong habits that will make dispute resolution easier. This will educate your children to accept mistakes, both their own and those of others, and that forgiveness is a crucial tool for successful family communication.
If you've been using yelling to discipline your children, you've probably noticed the following effects:
Your children may rely on yelling to communicate with one another.
Instead of simply speaking nicely, they speak back and even yell at you.
Your relationship with them is unpredictable and volatile to the point where you are unable to communicate effectively.
They may drift away from you and be influenced more by their classmates than by you.
You have the power to change everything. Begin by discussing with your children the dangers of yelling and why expressing your anger in this manner is unhealthy.
Create a calm climate in your house where everyone communicates with respect and acknowledges each other's feelings without blaming, shaming, or judging. A firm commitment keeps the lines of communication open and everyone in the family accountable.
Don't give up if you make a mistake. That is not an easy path, but it is well worth the effort.
Is your rage too intense?
If your rage frequently spills over to your children and you struggle to keep your cool on a regular basis, admitting that you have a problem is the first step toward learning how to handle it.
This can help you feel better about yourself and speak with your children in a calm and loving manner.
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