Steem4nigeria Accelerator Contest Week 53: Parental Enforcement of Decisions on Children

Normally, parents are the ones that influence their children's choices and even make those choices right from their toddler years to adolescence. This enforcement in the decision-making of their children is what shapes their future, their values, and their choices, and so coupled with the high societal demands and expectations, it is a common practice amongst parents, and even in the next generation, the parents will want to pass the standard that has been practiced on us after all they say, "Parents know best.".

Personally, I think it is okay depending on the age and the decision about to be made at that particular moment. This is because a parent's primary obligation is to take care of and protect their children until they're old enough to do so themselves or until they're adults.

And so if a parent knows that this decision his or her child is about to make is not a wise one or can potentially harm that child, instead of just completely blocking out the child, to show that you are interested in your child and their plans, you listen while firmly telling the child in a parental way why that decision isn't ideal until they realise it themselves, hence you've influenced that child's decision.

This is usually a big decision that is not supposed to be rushed or hastily made because such decisions completely change the lives of these children. So they have to be made with careful consideration. And the role of parents in such decision-making is to share their wisdom and their experiences in such matters, because letting the child know how big this decision is and what you, who have passed through such experiences, have faced will help that child make good decisions regarding such matters.

They can also offer resources aside from their own experiences; other people's experiences, including counselling, will also help. Parents role in giving their children guidance is to be open and honest with their thoughts, feelings, and concerns and fears about such decisions. And they can do this by having open communication with them.

But while doing so, parents should be careful to respect their children's decisions even while offering guidance, thereby allowing them a sense of responsibility and the ability to learn from their mistakes.

Yes, I think that parents can misguide their children in decision making based on their own biased perspectives, because they may be prejudiced about such decisions, or they may not have had experience in it and so will impose their influence on that child's decision.

Another way I think a parent can misguide their children in decision making is when they want their children to pursue their own dreams and aspirations instead of allowing the child freedom of choice and so base their support on whether that child accepts their own decision or not.

Sometimes excessive overprotection can also make them misguide their children in decision making because they feel this child isn't ready to face the outside world, they don't know anything about this place, this people or this lifestyle so they'll rather cage the child with their influence and hinder that child's ability to develop decision making skills and an independent spirit.

Yes, I remember when I wanted to go to the university for the first time, and initially my mom wanted me to go to a university in Benin, far away from home. While I had another choice, I liked hers because I wanted a change of environment and I've always wanted to go to school far away.

We were all good and came to a decision until one evening she called me and told me she changed her mind, saying that I wasn't going to go to that university in Benin City and that I should go to our hometown university. I was so devastated. All the reasons I listed for her to see why I wanted this decision proved invalid; after all, she was going to sponsor me, so I had no say.

I wanted to know why she suddenly changed her mind, and eventually, after a few a few weeks, I found out. To my greatest surprise, it was a friend of hers who told me I was going far away and advised her against it. Apparently, the person had limited experience and wasn't exposed at all, so she was being stereotypical and basing all her claims on the rumours she heard about the university in Benin city.

Hence, she was able to convince my mom, who didn't give me a chance, to also show her why I chose there. So this is a typical example of how parents can misguide their children in decision-making through limited experience and little exposure.

I invite @usoro01, @ruthjoe and @gracebonnie