THE TRUE WORDS THAT HURT

INTRODUCTION

Hello beautiful people, greetings to you all. I hope all is well and you are doing great.
Today in the free writers community. I bring you a fantastic emotional narration by me. Read and learn, guys.

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THE TRUE WORDS THAT HURT

I never knew a time would come in my life when I'd have many options and find it difficult selecting a spouse. Not for the first time but for the second time.
Me! How?

Now the mere thought of marriage makes me cringe... I mean, it’s not such a bad thing though, especially doing it with someone who ticks all your boxes... but in this generation, we like to lie to ourselves a lot.
Can a human being with flesh and blood, a non-celestial being like us, actually tick all our boxes? Can we even tick all our boxes for ourselves?

When marriage talk comes up, nobody talks about how it affects your mental well-being. Nobody talks about how it changes you as a person.

The constant need for validation, encouragement, and assurance from your spouse...

The sacrifices people make in order to accommodate another human being in their lives...

The fact that not everyone in your partner’s family will love you. Some can even enter marriage, and it will turn out to be a battleground for them, while some will do marriage and end up carrying double burdens of their in-laws...

The pain of childbirth, recovery from childbirth, and postpartum depression!!!
How come nobody talks about postpartum depression? Seriously!

The dreadful moments when you have to BEG for love and affection from the very partner you swore Forever and Ever with because they are “not in the mood." Is it the low libido that happens to you as a result of them constantly not being in the mood?

The times when they dare you, push all your buttons, and drive you crazy, but you’re expected to be the bigger person and become a stone without feeling so that their words don’t get to you and threaten the peace in your home. You still gotta be with them because marriage brought you together. After all, it’s a FOREVER thing.

Is it the fact that most times you will have to give up on your dreams in order to be a supportive partner and “make your marriage work”?

The times you have to endure the toxicity that comes from your partner, the negligence to your emotional needs...

The uncountable times that happiness would elude your life and depression takes in, but you have to endure it like that because “marriage is not a bed of roses.”.
It is also a bed of thorny vines, sharp knives, and venomous snakes. Lie on it like that and don’t complain.

Let's not even get started on the fact that expectations are high for you. You’re expected to be the best parent, supportive partner, hard-working man or woman, sex machine, best in-law, sacrificial partner that just lives and dies for their spouse and children THAT WILL NOT CHEAT, and a SANE human being at the same time. How?

Well, while I believe it’s a wonderful feeling having to share your life with a person in the name of marriage, I also believe in the context of HAPPINESS AND FULFILMENT.
If it brings you happiness, by all means, do it.

Personally, I’ve long detached my happiness from togetherness of any form.
Be it relationship, marriage, or anything of such!
This is because I know that a human being will always be human.
Even the most spirit-filled ones can snap.
They have blood running in their veins!
They are not celestial beings!
They can never be perfect!
It will be unfair to tag them “bad” or judge them harshly when they don’t meet my expectations of a perfect partner because, at the end of the day, they are just humans.
So entrusting my happiness and fulfilment, or it’s continuity in the hands of 1 single human being, forever and ever? Ah!

Happiness and fulfilment are best when they emanate from oneself... from inside out.
That is why you need to be happy and fulfilled first as a person before doing marriage.
But then again, nobody talks about how someone you live in the same house with in the name of marriage can kill that happiness you came inside the marriage with.
They will tell you to “overlook” them (those very partners of yours) and do your thing, but we all know it’s mission impossible. That’s why I said we like to lie to ourselves a lot.

How in the world can you overlook someone you literally live in the same house with? Sleep on the same bed with? Eat from the same pot with? And in doing so, without replacing them in your hearts, giving room for attention to another person who would reciprocate it willingly, or using another person as a temporary distraction?
How? Just how?
That’s how many of you end up bitter without redemption.

A good partner can make a happy soul happier, a fulfilled soul more fulfilled, and a good life healthier and longer.
The question is, HOW MANY OF YOU ARE GOOD PEOPLE? Let alone good partners.

Thanks for reading my post

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