Grandpa Gotta Eat: Out!

Good evening, and welcome to this edition of Grandpa Gotta Eat.

Today will be kind of a mishmash of different foods I've eaten over the last few weeks, all having the common theme of being purchased at some kind of restaurant, be it fast food or sit down.

In turn, like the topic, this post will also be a mixture of different things—part review, part rant, and part daily log.

So, now that you got the low down, let's get on with it, shall we?

The Oregon Double Whammy

Let's get the rant out of the way first.

A while back, I stored forever on this blockchain my thoughts concerning the new straw law Oregon passed last year that went into effect some months ago.

Well, in addition to that, another law was passed that essentially bans bags. Mainly plastic bags. Thus, at grocery stores and apparently restaurants, they're withholding the bags. At least free ones. Oddly enough, there are still bags in this ban, but if you want one, you need to pay five cents—per bag.

This is now Oregon state law. Prior to this, cities around the state had enacted their own version of the bag ban.

So, not only is there a state single use straw law, but now there is the statewide bag ban.

Let me show you what the bag ban looks like, according to Subway.

Does Anything Look Odd To You?

This occurred a couple of weeks ago. It was the last time I went to Subway. It might also be the last time I ever go in Oregon, at least through the drive through.

Take a good look at the image. What do you see?

Two foot long sandwiches (I was hungry, okay? Don't judge! Okay, not that hungry. One was for my daughter-in-law). In addition, there's a bag of chips and a bag with a macadamia nut and white chocolate cookie. I got a drink, too, but it didn't make it into the photo.

What's missing?

Well, typically, they put everything but the drink into a plastic bag that has Subway printed on it. Makes it super convenient to carry your food in and out of the car, and it's also versatile as it can then double as a garbage bag for all of the paper wrapping and such when you're done.

Or it could have been, had I been given one. Not this time. Nope, instead, I was handed each item in turn, and left to sit it on the seat of the van.

Meanwhile...

I went to Panda Express a day or two after that.

Look what they gave me to carry my food in.

That's the biggest, nicest fast food carrying bag I've ever seen. And guess what? It was free. Came with the meal.

Guess where I'm going back to, even though I actually like the food there considerably less than I like the food at Subway?

Okay. In reality, it's totally unfair to penalize a business for following state law. I'm sure their corporate headquarters finds it to be a total nuisance that now they have two sets of rules to live by—bag ban in Oregon (oh, there's probably some other state out there doing the same thing), and then everywhere else.

So, maybe I'll end up back at Subway, but I won't be happy about it. Maybe I'll just hand the drive thru person my Panda bag to put my food in.

There's The Straw Law

This is the fate of every straw that I have ever used to drink a soda out of a paper or plastic cup. As you can clearly see, the straws are in the garbage bag, and they're even still in the cups.

Now, since I've been patronizing quite a few drive thrus, I can speak with some authority about the implementation of said single use straw law.

There are variations.

• There are the places who ask first if I want a straw. When, I reply, "Yes, please," I am handed the straw along with my drink.

• There are the places who just give me my dang straw, no questions asked. I figure they figure if I'm asking for a soda, which comes in a cup, with a lid, with a hole in the lid to put the straw, that I have essentially asked for a straw. These places get gold stars each, and my undying gratitude.

• There are the places that will not give you a straw until you ask them. They will hand you your food and your drink, but until you say something, not even a hint of a straw. Then, when you do ask, they will say something like, "Of course," or "Here you go," as if they really wanted to hand you the straw, but you were too hesitant or dumb to ask for it sooner.

I find this all very insulting and needless.

"But Grandpa! We've got to do something to save the environment! The oceans are filling with garbage!"

Not from me, they're not. Nor would I say 98% of the population of the Oregon. I'm being generous allowing for the two percent, because we do have need of freeway cleanup crews, and there's always something along rivers and streams and sometimes at the beach.

So, yes, littering certainly does exist, but neither of these laws are going to stop it from happening.

"But, we've got to do something!"

Be responsible, and if you see someone littering, remind them politely to pick it up, or, if you'd rather avoid confrontation, wait around to pick it up yourself. If you want it to stop, though, take pictures of them and their garbage and then turn the idiots in. That's what the litter fines are for. They'll think twice next time and not litter.

Case closed.

*****************END OF RANT****************

Food Reviews

Okay, if anyone is still reading after that, here's a couple of reviews, including a head to head pizza battle.

First, though, I want to talk about Tiny Tacos.

Grandpa's Food Tip—Tiny Tacos

As everyone knows, the taco is the greatest invention of all time, far and away eclipsing sliced bread and whatever Little Caesars is trying to convince you of in their latest commercials.

It might seem impossible therefore, for such a miraculous and life altering invention to actually be improved upon, but I'm here to report that it is true. Tiny tacos are actually the greatest invention known to man. And woman. All. Together.

Now, if that hasn't already sent you into a Google search frenzy, let me tell you where you can find them. Hint: it's not a Mexican place. It's good ol' jolly Jack-in-the-Box. Yep. That's right.

For three measly dollars, you can get, 15—yes, count them (uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, seis...) 15 amazing crunchy Tiny Tacos for $3 USD.

For those into math breakdowns, that's five tacos per dollar, or 20¢ a tiny taco!

At that price point, don't expect a lot inside the crunchy shell. I'm not even sure what it is. Meat maybe? For the $3 USD variety, there's no lettuce or tomato or cheese. They do come with a creamy avocado lime sauce to dunk the Tiny Tacos in if you are so inclined, but after a few dips, I found I preferred my Tiny Tacos as is.

Now, if lettuce, cheese and taco sauce is your thing, for a whopping whole dollar more (yes, that's right—it's pure unadulterated madness) you can upgrade to the loaded variety. I have not tried the latter, so I cannot opine upon the loaded at this time. Perhaps I shall partake of them at a later date. If I do, I will report back whether it was worth it or not.

I feel I should warn you. These Tiny Tacos are highly addictive. Like Pringle's, you can't eat just one. Before you know it, those 15 tacos will be consumed, and you will have no one to blame but yourself.

Here's where Grandpa's Tip comes in: If someone else wants to share the box of Tiny Tacos with you, say, your spouse or significant other, politely decline and tell them to buy their own dang box.

They're that good.

Go ahead. Go now. Get some. You will thank me later.

Pizza Vs. Pizza

For those readers who have been following Grandpa Gotta Eat, you know I love pizza. Good pizza. Not the stuff you can generally buy frozen at the store, and not big chain pizza, either. Smaller chains and local pizzerias are where it's at.

I've chronicled a couple of times some pizzas I've tried at Gallucci's Pizzeria in Lincoln City.

I've like them all so far to one degree or another, but I think I may have finally found the one I like the best there.

Let me introduce you to the Gallucci's Deluxe.

This is an 8" Wonder of the World which includes:

• Pepperoni
• Salami
• Hamburger
• Cheese
• Mushrooms
• Onions (I asked them to kindly leave them off for me this time)
• Black olives
• Green peppers

Confession Time

I'm not a big fan of pepperoni or salami. I know, I know. How un-American or un-Italian, or un-Human of me. It's been a burden I've born most of my life.

However, in combination, along with the rest of the ingredients, this Deluxe is a taste sensation of epic proportions. It's zesty, it's filling and it's satisfying.

The pizza sauce and crust are just right in flavor and proportion. I will definitely be eating it again.

And again...

And again...

The Challenger

This last trip for the coast route, I was a little later getting started so I could keep busy until I needed to collect money from the machines at a place that doesn't open until 4 pm. That meant I wouldn't be reaching Lincoln City at my usual 2 pm time, so I decided I would try a place I had yet to eat at in Newport—Cobblestone Pizza.

What caught my attention when I went to their website was the availability of a taco pizza. I've talked about taco pizzas in the past. I tried one from Tye Dye Pizza a while back because it had a refried bean base. I've spoken to the fact that in order to be a true taco pizza, the refried beans are critical.

Guess what? What? Cobblestone offered a taco pizza with refried beans, too! How could I not try it out?

I was born to do so. So, I did.

Aside from the aforementioned have to have refried bean base, this small-sized pizza comes with:

• Ground beef
• Onion
• Black olive
• Taco seasoning
• Lettuce
• Tomato
• Shredded cheddar cheese

The Verdict

So much promise, but alas, the crust gets in the way.

Someone who can still eat their weight in pizza would surely love it, but in my case, it's no longer about quantity, but capacity, and enjoying what I can pack away to its fullest.

Unfortunately, the crust was super thick (though tasty), and it took away from everything else, other than the tomato and cheese. Those things, sadly, kept falling off the slice I was trying to eat. Part of the problem was, the pizza was not completely cut, and so trying to actually procure a slice was a chore. And since the toppings were not secured by cheese, including the cheese itself, it just kept falling back into the box.

Never say never, though. On a thinner crust, properly sliced, and sitting at a table, I believe this taco pizza would be glorious.

But such was not the case, so the Gallucci's Deluxe wins the taste test competition hands down.

End of contest.

This Is Not The Post That Never Ends

So, let's see.

Rant. Check.
Review. Check.
A pinch of daily log. Check.

That must mean that this edition of Grandpa Gotta Eat is nearing its close.

Parting, as they say, is always such sweet sorrow.

But, there is always next time, too.

So, until then...

...you know what to do...

...Enjoy!

_{All images courtesy of Glen Anthony Albrethsen}

As always, Grandpa Gotta Eat is posted in conjunction with @foodfightfriday, your on chain weekly food contest. All are invited to participate in the fun. Simply write a post about food, publish it on a Friday, use the #fff tag, and then venture over to read some other entries so you can vote for your favorite. You'll be happy you did. It's totally the contest of the people by the people and for the people.