Source

Working in the hospital these days has brought out a side of me that I never thought would come to light.

I'm typically this jolly good fellow that never gets mad at people. My friends in secondary school even used to say that I never get angry.

Gradually I have noticed that no one has that compliment for me anymore.

But was it a compliment?

In my second year in the university, I remember one guy used my towel to lay on the floor because I hung it out to dry.

I use to blame myself so much for that incident, like maybe I was too close to the guy, or I somehow suggested that he could use my towel as a floor rag to lay on.

I don't know what changed, but I know that people don't treat me that way anymore.

Now people use words like grumpy to describe me. Or looking stressed, they would be too if they had to see so many humans act strange every day.

A weird day

I hate raising my voice at patients' relatives. I tend to think back at those moments and feel very bad. But I haven't had a rethought at this particular scenario until now. Call me monster all you want but it won't get to me I promise.

I was attending to this patient on a certain difficult day when no one could show up to work. Let's call the patient and her relatives people 1.

People 1 show up for because of their daughter's diarrhea. The child is weak but still conscious and alert you know.

People 2 came and their child was unconscious and was very low on the coma scale. I left them to be attended to by the doctor who was handing over duty to me.

My colleague who was leaving said he could not find people 1 all of a sudden and so he left.

People 1 came while I was busy attending to people 2 and they were pissed off at me for not attending to them.

I asked them where they went to and the mother replied that she had to eat.

Looking at myself

It was like staring into the mirror. How many times had I given myself that excuse for important things in my life?

Food has been a problem for me...it slows me down because I constantly overeat and if there was anyone who would understand her...it would be me.

So that's why I knew when words left my mouth they were words she needed to hear.

I didn't caution her about the fact that she needed to stop letting her love for food boss her around. I let her know that what she did was not right and she made life difficult for everyone.

When I was able to stabilize patient 2. I started handling her case.

But what do you think

I would like to know your thoughts...

Am I a monster for responding that way?

Should she have been more aware of my predicament?

What would you have done if it were you?