Getting better: anxiety front (Part 3)

Today was our third session. Both of us, especially my wife, were quite excited. We were confident that today we would learn something new, understand it better, and ultimately help ourselves feel better. Additionally, our dear doctor insisted that we should avoid falling sick (physically or mentally), which was quite reassuring.

Usually, most doctors just prescribe medicine for physical illnesses and send the patients home with a quick response, because they have many patients to see, which is understandable. But they should take some time to explain what caused the illness, how to identify the symptoms early, and how to prevent it from recurring. I believe that the overall health of society will shift from a curative approach to a preventive one. Anyway...

We quickly got ready, settled down for our favorite tea routine ritual, and reviewed what had happened in the previous session. We realized that our journey had moved from 'feeling better' to 'getting better.'

We took the car and reached the clinic at exactly 11 AM. The doctor arrived with us. There was only one patient before us. After that, it was our turn. There was a beautiful chart displayed outside, which I read and mentally pinned. It was roughly as follows:

From this, I realized that feeling normal and healthy doesn't just depend on our thoughts, but also on other factors that influence those thoughts. This could be called a holistic ecosystem. How interesting is that!

Just then, the receptionist rang the bell, and we went inside. They greeted us nicely, and after some formal chat, the session began.

He said, "So, we have an idea about the factors triggering your anxiety at physiological, social, and psychological levels. Now, let's move towards preventive measures."

She thought that now they would give us some pills or something. The doctor noticed the expression on her face.

He said, "In this diagnosis, we have to differentiate according to stages—mild, severe, acute, and disorder. In your case, since it's at a very mild stage, there's currently no need for medication."

She sighed in relief. And so did I.

He continued, "The first step is to recognize that anxiety is here. Some people don't even realize it, and then suddenly, a direct attack happens, and only then do they become aware. This is due to a lack of awareness. In your case, since it's mild, you can notice it quite well. The first point here is to understand how you feel 'right now,' 'in this moment.' There are many techniques to understand this, but one simple and very useful technique is the 'Physiological Sigh.' You take a deep breath, then take another small breath to completely fill your lungs, and slowly exhale through your mouth."

I said, "This is so simple!"

He said, "There's no need to go into the neurological functioning of this technique, but it works excellently. Another thing is that if you train yourself with this technique when you're not anxious, it'll be easier to deal with anxiety when it actually occurs."

I turned towards her, and she repeated my line back to me.

"Practice makes perfect!" We all laughed.

He said, "The next step is to try and calmly, neutrally observe whatever terrifying thought you're having, to understand that 'I am not this thought,' and to tell yourself that."

This technique is called distancing. We looked at each other and said, "Wow!" This task is to be done in your mind, with yourself, but it is quite simple.

He continued, "It's even better if you do this by writing it down, typing it out, or performing some action. Always remember, the body remembers action!"

I said, "Hmm... this is interesting."

He said, "The third point is desensitizing! This means slowly approaching or trying to get closer to whatever thing or thought you fear.

Slowly, you'll realize that what you thought was so scary isn't really that frightening. This builds courage, which then leads to confidence. All of this should be done in small steps so that your brain gets used to it.

Even the brain needs to be trained, and it does get trained—this was something new for us.

He said, "Yes, and through this desensitizing, you'll gain awareness and courage, leading to internal 'sense of safety,' which will take you towards getting better. After this, we'll see how to move towards flourishing. But that's for another time..."

There's one more point left—socializing!

Actual physical face-to-face socializing in real-time is very important. Talking to people around you, establishing contact, having conversations—this creates a sense of connection. This also helps you feel better.

I said, "That's why we're planning to have a monthly get-together with our school friends."

He said, "Yes, that's very important for the unease that comes from loneliness. The more community contact, the stronger the connection, and the lower the risk of anxiety!"

We were truly mesmerized by how many layers there are to the dimensions of individual thoughts in our minds.

He said, "If you properly use these techniques, you won't even need me. And if you do, I'm always here!"

We all laughed heartily. Then we bid farewell. Now I was even more determined about our get-together. We said goodbye to the doctor and went straight to our coffee shop! This had become yet another celebration ritual for us. We felt so much better today, having gained all these insights. Now it was time to take action. She promised me about that, and we happily headed home.