Why So Serious?

Last night as I was enjoying my one hour of silence before sleep, I had a think about my life, all this perpetual pursuit of what I really want and the hardships that come with it. Then I thought, I was taking everything way too seriously lately. And it is making me more stressed and anxious than I already am. I feel like I am needing some kind of special attention from whoever is in charge of the universe. Why you, the universe, is against me?

Anyway, since when did I become too serious? Back in the day when I was still sweet as Georgia Peach, I was just you know, going with the flow. Back in the day when my mind was still uncorrupted by the unpleasant truths about the world. I was living and seeing things with a childlike sense of wonder, running around with a lollipop spreading craziness and love, in a fun way though. So innocent, so magical, so free. Until life happened.

As I get older, I've learned so many things about the world and the humans in it. I no longer see everything through my rose-colored glasses. I became a disappointed idealist. Who would have a thought a girl once running around with a lolly would now be diabolic realist, an inconvenient truth slapper, a woman warrior, or whatnot? Harsh experiences do make us.

How I wish there's like a reset or undo button in life. Everything that had happened took away my innocence and turned me into this. This @diabolika that y'all know. Getting mad at pretty much everything bad, getting mean, and even sometimes. Running around seeking some kind of retributive justice for all the pain and suffering. And then slowly, unconsciously, I am becoming the monster that I despise.

I don't know if you call this becoming wiser, I just call this becoming less of a dumb human being. Someone who already knows things. Bad things, good things, formidable things. The only good part I see in all of this is that now I am more aware. I am more aware that this world is ridiculous.

Now that I know this world is ridiculous, so why am I so serious? It should be hard to take it seriously if I take the Alien perspective. Like now what the hell are these humans up to now? Should there be a divine Alien intervention or should I just sit around and laugh at all this ridiculousness because maybe it's not worth all the energy after all. Like riding my Alien ship all the way to whatever ridiculousness humans are up to and fighting and yelling, you've done this to me! Gee no thanks, I am good here in my remote and Alien green life.

For all we know, we don't even matter to these Aliens. We are just tiny specks in the cosmos. They are pretty much enjoying their lives God knows where looking down at us, shaking their heads in disbelief and Alien eyes rolling aggressively. So if we come to think of it, we are insignificant. None of these won't even matter when we die. Okay maybe the Aliens are in charge here but we still don't know anything for sure. So, the point is, well the point is there is no point.

So why so serious?

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previously, previously, previously,

Paradise Can Be Hostile