Have to put up a link to this one, because Steemit doesn't like the formatting, for some reason. It's just a fluffy humor piece, anyway:
Mayor declared war on soft drinks ... but still loved donuts:
https://markrhunter.blogspot.com/2021/06/mayor-declared-war-on-soft-drinks-but.html
"They can have my Slurpee when they pry it from my cold, sticky hands."